The Trading Tribe
(c) Ed Seykota 2003-2010 - Write for permission to reprint.
Ed Seykota's FAQ

Reader Says

Ed Says

Saturday, October 9, 2010

Tribe Report - Reconciling with Parents
A Surprising Process

Ed,

At a recent Tribe meeting, my entry point is my difficulty cleaning up my garage and den.  The Tribe helps me trace this back to guilt about throwing things away - from childhood training.  This goes back to scolding by my mother and father. In particular, my mother scolds me by disapproving of me, invalidating me, abandoning me and rejectding me.

the Tribe helps me notice my resource for dealing with rejection is to momentarily feel sadness and rejection - and then to quickly shut down.  We trace this back to a particularly vivid event with my mother in which I show her something of which I am proud and she shows me strong disapproval.

The Tribe helps me develop new resources, through role-playing - namely, to stay "awake" and share my feelings with her and to get her feelings.  I tell her all about my sadness and feelings of rejection and she gets it and tells me she wants to be close and share feelings with me.  It's a real break-through for me.

As I am practicing these resources, one of the Tribe members keeps interrupting my process to give me micro-management instructions, such as "OK, now hug your mom."  It totally wrecks the moment.

This really sets me off.  I start yelling and screaming at the Tribe member for interrupting my process - then I notice I am yelling at my father, who I recall doing the same thing - giving me tasks to do every time I try to get an emotional connection with my mother - or with him.

The Tribe goes with it. They start to give me encouragement to supplement my yelling and screaming with telling my father how I am feeling and to find out how he is feeling.  I tell him I feel frustration and anger about not being able to connect with my mother or with him - and that I don't feel anything around him.  He tells me he is sorry.  I tell him I hear he is sorry and I don't feel any sorrow.  I tell him I don't feel any emotions around him.  Then I notice this is OK.  I stop taking it personally.  I notice that's his way and that he is doing the best he can.  I thank him for sharing with me and I give him a hug.

Then I go back and complete with my mother.

The net result is that I have new resources to deal with rejection and with people who are emotionally non-responsive.  I do not have to hold it in and then yell and scream about it. I can stay in the moment and connect to the extent they are willing and accept whatever connection we have as perfect in the moment.

Since the meeting, I notice I am feeling much more peaceful, less judgmental and that I am getting better results with less effort in dealing with people in all kinds of situations.

I notice I am also feeling like letting go of a lot of the junk around the house.

I wish to thank my Tribe for hanging in there with me and for being willing to accommodate and find the positive intentions of the surprising turn of events as they unfold.
Thank you for sharing your process.


Yelling

may not be as effective ...
http://stuffwhitedbagslike.wordpress.com/2008/05/16/rants/

... as connecting.
http://www.practicalsocialskills.com/2009/05/
5-easy-eye-contact-exercises.html
Saturday, October 9, 2010

To The Penny

Hi Ed,

I've succeeded in developing an Excel based trading system and matching your results to the penny. I feel great!

Cheers,
Congratulations on your results.

The original copper pennies currently have a melt value around 3 cents.  The new zinc ones have an "intrinsic" value around 1/2 cent.


Pennies

provide an alternative way to tile a floor.

Next up: dollar bills for wall-paper.
http://www.apartmenttherapy.com/ny/
tile-stone-countertops/penny-tile-floor-at-the-
standard-hotel-notcotcom-088953
Friday, October 8, 2010

Wants to attend the Workshop

Dear Ed,

I contacted you previously about learning about trading. Thanks for your helpful suggestions. I'm currently in [City] for a project and decide to join the local trading tribe group, conducted by [Name]. He mentioned to me that there might be a workshop in December. I would like to attend if there are still any seats left. Please let me know how I should proceed. Have a pleasant weekend!

P.S. I enjoyed the material and especially the song on your site very much.
See the Workshop link, above.
Friday, October 8, 2010

Getting in Balance

Hi Ed,

[My Tribe] meets 9/25. There is two of us. We start the meeting discussing progress working on our projects. My projects are:

* I have a client
* I am in great shape
* I have strong performing trading system
* I have balanced/surplus family budget

Going to the meeting I revise the progress since last meeting. I see that I do little effort other than thinking about my I have a client project and that my effort on getting into great shape is also mediocre. I consider making excuses and explanations before stopping myself and asking a question - "Do I really want this or not?"

I focus on the feelings and see that I am just not committed enough to the get in shape project and that I feel fear of unknown and what could happen from I have a client project. I share my feelings with my Trading Tribe fellow and commit to greater effort in pursuit of achieving my projects. I receive no pass on both of these projects and pass on the other two.

Progress since last TT meeting (two weeks):

I have a client

* I prepare presentation of the Investment program in MS Outlook and start practicing delivering it.
* I prepare list of financial planners and advisors in this area whom I intend to visit
* I feel that I find ways of distracting myself and avoid more work on this project - I procrastinate. I have a feeling of being in uncharted territory. I move slowly and I am afraid to ask questions in right places not to look stupid. It takes me week and a half to contact NFA compliance department to ask some simple questions. It turns out to be a no event kind of thing: question > answer > done.

I am in great shape

(Each week according to my commitment)

* Eat well
* 4 times gym
* 2 times running 2.75 miles
* 2 times bicycle 6.5 miles
* 2 times driving range

PASS - I feel great, lose weight gain muscles. My golf game improves.

I have strong performing trading system.

I take my feeling of not good enough to the Tribe on Sep. 11th, (August 6th 2010) Following that I look over my trading results. I notice that at the beginning of my trading I make a decision to adjust my money management to trade heavily on long side and lightly on short side.

I make some fundamental predictions (secular bull market in commodities) about future and tweak the system in that way. As we all know fall of 2008 is one of the biggest short opportunities in quite some time and I find a way to avoid the profits.

I recognize the error and in August 2009 I tweak the system in such a way that I trade the short side heavier. I make yet again fundamental prediction (deflation) about future this time in opposite direction. I trade the short side heavier than my testing suggest is optimal. In August 2010 I run tests and realize that the system makes over 130% returns for the optimal settings in last couple of years.

I tweak it only twice and mange to cut performance of my account to a third of what it could be! I feel embarrassed and amazed at the same time. I feel like I lost the opportunity. I recognize these feelings are what I am after. My system is not that bad after all. My messing with it is what makes its performance mediocre. In August 2010 I adjust the settings to what I find optimal between and make no further predictions about the future. I notice that the feeling motivating me in September 2008 to trade the long side heavy is feeling of fear from large draw down. (the markets are already falling down in September 2008) and I worry that I get whipsawed in many of them just to see them turn up again. In August 2009 I experience anxiety from not being balanced enough trading almost exclusively on long side only. The feelings I experience leading me to current change are at first not good enough and then wanting to trade profitable, heaving great results. Please notice how I over-shoot first on long side and then on short side before setting the system to its optimal settings for balance between long and short side the math and my stomach suggest.

I have balanced/surplus family budget

* We do well for couple of months now. Living below our means, cooking at home, playing in the back yard does not only saves as tons of money we have much more fun!

My fellow Tribe member presents his projects 5 altogether. It is his first time doing it and we spend considerable time on the task. I assist him to clarify some of the projects. We do a lot of talking.

It is getting late and we proceed to take hot seats. My fellow tribe member takes a recent trade to the hot seat. He describes how he identifies a trade takes it and once it reaches his target decides to not exit and holds longer. The trade turns around shortly thereafter and he just keeps watching it in disbelief as it turns into a loss. As he describes the situation his form of clenching fists and anger in his face starts to develop and I support him on it. He works thru many forms and has many past revelations of when he feels this.

At some point his form becomes vocal calling out "Stupid!" over and over. We freeze the form. He remembers to be about 5 years old and taking a valuable object from his parents with his brother. He describes how they wrap it in the paper and urinate on it, then throwing it into the garbage. After parents find out what happened and go look for it in the garbage he remembers this same feeling - "strong regret of doing something stupid".

I suggest for him to experience "doing something stupid". He seems to really enjoy the form and we have great fun with it. It is like adrenaline rush! Once it turns into the regretful feeling we get stuck over and over. He reflects on his life and sees that many dramas in trading, relationship and work bring these feelings to his attention. He does not reach the zero point. He seems to be disappointed. I praise him on not completing. Great job! He chuckles and we seem to both understand that we got far today just not all the way.

It is late and we are tired. I do not take the hot seat.

As I am getting ready for tomorrows TT meeting I notice

* not liking reading on FAQ's about trader making 110% in three months following the flash crash - I am jealous, I want to be the best. I feel this way often when people do better than me.

I also see my son many times being up-set when he doesn't hit the ball as well as another kid or loses a game of any kind. He wants to be the best. If he loses he gets upset with himself saying "I am not good at this" and shuts down. It hurts me to see that. For a while now I go and invalidate him by saying that he indeed is good and that he needs to practice to become better. I just now realize that it hurts me so much to see him do that as I do not like to feel that way also. I take this as an entry point to Tribe.

* I am procrastinating on my "I have clients" project - It seems to follow the pattern I am in uncharted territory > I am not sure what I do > I am not good at this > I do nothing. Just like I notice with my son.

Thank you for reading.

Thank you everybody for posting,

Thank you Ed for your support and wisdom you share with us.
Thank you for sharing your process and your insights.
Friday, October 8, 2010

Practice

Dear Ed:

Practice! I assert that one powerful method to adhere to a trading plan is to practice. Practice tends to strengthen the ability to trade the plan or alert the learner to more effective plans.
I wonder how you figure to put all that practice into practice.
Friday, October 8, 2010

The Need for Speed

Ed,

Ed says:

You might consider making sure that you and your clients your clients know and obey the laws that govern your speed trap app.


Thank you for your feedback on my venture. My device aids in clarifying the intentions of law enforcement. I think of it as increasing transparency in local government.

My observation is that people are more likely to obey laws when they notice enforcement of these laws. Some jurisdictions put up road signs that notify drivers of speed cameras up ahead. Traffic slows down in the area between the sign and the camera. To the extent that the government's intention is to encourage compliance with speed limits, my device helps materialize this intention.

You might consider developing a pro-forma financial plan to assist potential investors evaluate their chances to make a profit with you.

I wonder if you feel that my business plan belongs on FAQ.
Thank you for the clarification on your invention.

You might consider including, in your marketing materials,  an opinion from law enforcement officials in the jurisdictions in which you are thinking to sell your product.

I suggest that a pro-forma plan might be a standard step in raising seed capital.


Jails

are full of people

who have their own interpretations
of the law.
http://www.starzlife.com/20100720/lindsay-goes-to-jail/
Thursday, October 7, 2010

TSP Continuous Contract - Last True Gold

Hi Ed,

On the Gold contracted posted on your site for the TSP, is it a Panama Last True Continuous Contract?

I reviewed the TSP on Continuous Contracts and am learning about splicing contracts.

I can replicate the results of the first true method on the S&P 500 contracts.

However the gold contract I cannot replicate the splice. I am using CRB data. I believe results should be close to the Gold contact file that is posted on your site. I have attached the file (GC----C.csv).

I normalize the data, start from the same date and any way I splice the contracts my results are out a considerable amount compared to the (GC----C.csv) file.

I compare with CSI data and their back adjuster. I can replicate their results reasonably well.

(CRB and CSI do not agree on all observations but describe the contacts reasonably well.)

I have attached a CSI back adjusted gold contract file ( CSI_Gold_Comex .CSV) and my back adjusted file (Panama_last_true_Last_True_COMEX_Gold.csv)
I used an adjustment of six days before expiry.

These are differences in settlement price between my algorithm and CSI's.

These are differences in settlement price between my algorithm and the Gold Continuous Contract posted on your site
using a six day adjustment before expiry.

I can fix the initial data up a bit by increasing the adjustment before expiry.

However, the discrepancy in the end is still high. I am
comparing PanamaLastTrueGoldComparison.csv attached with (GC----C.csv).

The CRB Gold Comex contacts data I am using has extra observations at: (I removed these)
20050913 453.6 453.8 448.6 450.1 54963 321200
20050831 435.6 438.8 435.4 438.2 62148 287346

I have also observed some puzzling numbers for the Volume and Open Interest in the Gold contact (GC----C.csv).
20050823 443.7 444.3 443.4 444.3 2 198

Looking forward to reading your comments.

Thank you for the TSP!
Thank you for raising this issue.

The generation of continuous contracts involves various choices - such as determining when to roll and to which contract to roll.

Some people roll on the last day, some roll, say, five days before and some roll a couple days before first notice day.

Some people roll to the next month, some roll to the next quarter and some roll to the most liquid.

If you wish to explore these issues further, you might like to assist me in testing a recent revision of my continuous contract generator.
Thursday, October 7, 2010

A Research Proposal

Hi Ed,

I see that you are having a new Workshop, and I am following up on my proposal last year (see FAQ, 12/24/2009, Wants to do some research and 1/2/2010, Research Project). As I already stated, my intention is to study and share the result on how people manifest their intention, to learn from those who succeed, and also learn from those who do not. What works? What doesn't?

Just like you state "report experiences to FAQ" as one of the many requirements for on-going participation in your Tribe. (www.seykota.com/tribe/Directory/index.htm), my idea is to ask Workshop participants to opt-in this project, where I (or some volunteer) periodically (say, quarterly) ask for an update with their progress on their Big Waves. Of course it is not mandatory, and they can opt-out any time. Ideally, we can even start with previous workshop graduates.

The main purpose is to get feedback. Yes, there are reports on the FAQ, but I notice they are just a small fraction of the total. I see an almost exponential decay in the number of Big Wave Newsletter updates that I've subscribed to since the April 2009 Workshop. When I talk to some of the other graduates, they have put aside their Big Waves, and naturally they don't appear in the FAQ. As such, FAQ has a selection bias, and I'm interested in seeing a more comprehensive study in what works and what doesn't.

Ed says, "I wonder how you are figuring to get people who don't like to report - to report to you."

As I already answered previously, I figure to do so by sharing my genuine intention with them on this research project (which is what I am doing now by sending this to FAQ). My guess is that some people would love to report no matter what (so we see them on FAQ anyway), and a small number would never report under any circumstances (and we never hear from them). My main target is actually the majority in the middle who do not report but might otherwise be willing to share their progress if someone asks them. In fact, by following-up with them it may even provide an extra incentive for them to take extra effort and be more productive (I know for me personally it would). They may not bother to write a 2-page report but don't mind answering a 2-minute survey (or even go in more details if they realize someone is
passionately interested in hearing and learning from them).

From your previous response on FAQ, I get a sense that you might see it as a form of control. To me, my suggestion here is really no different from where you list "report to FAQ" as a requirement for participation in your Tribe. If anything, my proposal has even lesser "control" as the participants can choose not to reply to my survey and opt-out entirely at any time. If you prefer, given my experiences at previous workshops, I can create a sample questionnaire for your approval. If you thinks it is OK, then we can send to all workshop participants on a quarterly or semi-annual basis, I can organize the feedback for you, and hopefully through this exercise we can learn more about what works and what doesn't.

I feel this is the best way I can provide a service while I can learn and grow at the same time. I am curious to hear how you feel about this proposal, thanks.

ciao,
Thank you for sharing your idea.

I do not reveal the identities of Workshop attendees or FAQ contributors.

They continue the work according to their individual levels of willingness.
Thursday, October 7, 2010 3:05 AM

Better Relationship with Father

Dear Ed,

Firstly , I would like to thank you for your TTP framework and other inputs given to me during the Reno workshop. It has certainly improved my relationship with my father. As I read the recent FAQ contributions, I am surprised to find similar drama (of perceived parental rejection) running the lives of a number of tribe members. Are undemonstrative parents an universal theme across cultures - western and eastern? If so, are there particular ways of parenting that can help bring up drama free children?

btw, when is your new book getting published?

thanks
Thank you for sharing your process.

The book is now in the editing process.
Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Tribe Report
Relationship with Husband and Kids Improving

Dear Ed,

I attend the Austin Tribe to Cross-Pollinate. I feel excited and anxious at the same time. I feel honored to hear excerpts from Ed’s new book. The words and music move me to tears. I hear reports from Austin tribe members regarding the completion of their projects , and I feel a sense of awe at what each member has accomplished, despite a “pass” or “no pass”.

After a satiating diner, a tribe member engages in a process where, as a child, he overhears his father tell his mother, “I never wanted him to have my name anyway”. Hearing this tears at my heart. The member gains new resources that he successfully uses to send and receive feelings with his father. The process concludes with an “I love you, Son.”, an “I love you, Dad.”, and a very long, heartfelt embrace. I feel a warm, gladness that the member has new resources for engaging in intimacy-based relationships. I see how this resource applies to aspects of my life. I am grateful for his process.

Now, it’s my turn. Sometimes, I have a difficult time communicating with my husband by answering his question with a question. The process manager helps me realize that it stems from a confrontation I have with my parents while in high school. My older sister (who is also in high school) moves out / in with her boyfriend while our parents are away on vacation. Upon their return, my parents blame me for her actions and try to place guilt on me for not saying anything to them while they were gone. Our argument culminates with me screaming, “What do you want from me?!” It is not until the process manager and role player (playing me) provide me with the tools of sending and receiving feelings, do I realize that my parents were worried about me doing the same thing; something, that does not come to mind until this meeting.

Since the meeting, I find that my communication with my husband, my son, and my mother are much more relaxed and productive. Much less drama. I am thankful to all the members of the Austin Tribe and the visiting tribe members.
 
Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Tribe Reports

Hello All,

Thank you for being on my support team.

I attend an Austin Tribe meeting last week as a cross pollinator. There are two hot seats with roll plays and I get a lot out of each. I find in my process, it’s the role plays, be them mine or someone else’s, where the rubber meets the road. In my experience, the role plays are so real that they trigger the feelings to open up the issue then, more critically, the role plays allow me to test the application of my new resources under a stressful situation. Perhaps like paper trading versus live trading. The role play, when made real enough, is live trading .

The first Hotseat involves a tribe member dealing with a knot tied up from a verbally abusive father. In his hot seat he gets to a time when he walks in on his parents arguing and hears his father tell his mother he never wanted his son (the tribe member) named after him. In his recollection his resource is to shut down, stuff those feelings down. In a series of role plays, the tribe member applies a new resource of telling his father how he feels and asking his father how he feels.

The role play resolves with a very heartfelt, meaningful, healing hug between the dad and the son. I get a lot out of seeing this resource in action, and reflect on how this is reinforcement of a resource I’m working to integrate into my behavior of going with the feeling I’m feeling in the moment rather than “turning the other check” or “pulling out the knife.” I’m struck by the feelings of vulnerability I notice in moment. Being vulnerable seems like such a key, almost a prerequisite. Often when sharing a feeling, particularly when applying a new resource, I notice feelings of vulnerability. So, using this as a signal, perhaps noticing a feeling of vulnerability is a clue of being in an intimacy based model and corresponds with the implementation of new resources.

The second Hotseat involves a tribe member dealing with parents whom seem very skillful in the control model via a machine gun fire of questions. In a role play when the tribe member is being aggressively peppered with questions she employs a resource of sharing how she feels and asking her parents how they feel. Like in the first Hotseat, I experience the feeling of vulnerability in this moment when the tribe member is being attacked with questions, control model, and then shifts to sharing a feeling, intimacy model. For me, choosing the intimacy model in stressful situation when I’m under fire is like pulling the trigger on a signal from my system when I really don’t want to. As I shift my personal ‘system’ to intimacy based I get better at pulling the trigger.

I notice a formula of principles that Ed mentions several times, like The Essentials. Check for willingness. Ask if they will share their feelings. Share my feelings.

Earlier in this month my system is getting my pretty aggressively long. Taking a shower one night I’m feeling stress about being heavily long and I have an AHA!...feeling fear of being heavily long is part of my process. I experience this feeling and then get back to sticking to my system. I have a similar AHA! when I have a couple stock blow ups, an earnings warning and an SEC investigation…mostly giving back decent profits and taking reasonably small losses. I recall feeling [humiliation] and [I deserve a winner]. My AHA! comes when I say to myself, okay, am I willing to experience these feelings so I can get back to sticking to my system. My answer is yes, they fade, and I stick to my system.

End of Q reporting: for Q3 ’10 I return 15.8%.

-----


Subject: Commitment Update 8-14-10

Hello All,

Thank you for being on my support team.

First, I note my intention to not send this out on time as it is now mid-August and my commitment is by the 3rd day on the new month.

I take five weeks off and go on vacation with my wife and kids at the beginning of July. I see lots of family and experience lots of opportunities to resist feelings and I pass on most all of them. I speak up many times using resources I practice in tribe and just go with what I’m feeling in that moment. This leaves me feeling satisfied and in the moment. I never feel any temptation or desire to “pull out the knife.”

I continue to work on my campaign to get more done. I notice when I’m supposed to do something and I space out or seek out distraction. I’m focusing on these moments.

I push further towards developing my life outside of trading, mostly spending time with my young children. A quote from Michael Marcus comes to mind…he in essence says if you don’t have something outside of trading…some balance… then you’ll either end up overtrading or flip out over temporary failures.

I have an Aha! about TTP fitting into my life. TTP is not a method for always being happy. It’s not a method for having things magically fall in my lap. It’s a method for removing blockages so that I can get on with the important work, the proactive path.

I notice something about the guidance from feelings…if I don’t take the guidance then I don’t get it. I also notice how fast feelings can come and go…in fractions of a second…but the message is clear and unabbreviated.

Flipping through the channels one night I catch an old Sopranos on which Tony Soprano gives a definition of a knot: “This psychiatry shit. Apparently what you’re feeling’ is not what you’re feelin’ and what you’re not feelin’ is your real agenda.”

Given we’re halfway through August my next update will be for September.

Sincerely,


-----


Subject: Commitment Update 6-6-10

Hello All,

Thank you for being on my support team.

I get a lot out of doing these reports and appreciate the feedback I receive.

I have a hodgepodge of things to report.

I accomplish several things in tribe meetings. I work on a knot I have about <being impolite>, particularly about being impolite to people with whom there’s a complex relationship, for example, an in-law. Previously, I have no middle ground resource. I have a resource of “turn the other cheek”, which is what I use 95% of the time or a resource of “pull out the knife”, to cut and brutalize with words, used the other 5% of the time. I now have a new resource of how to handle an insult or being told what to do or being judged. My tribe chief suggests a resource of noting and playing off of exactly what I feel when such a situation occurs. For example, if I’m feeling insulted by what is said then, “Thank you for insult.”

I do notice temptation and an increase in willingness to “pull out the knife” when I feel someone is treating me unjustly. With Tribe work, I am much, much more willing to experience feelings that can be consequences of “pulling out the knife,” such as <rejection> or <disapproval>. I feel a darkness and a pleasure in this. This feels young and rebellious to me. I have interest in exploring this though I feel like the wiser path is to commit to sharing feelings and work from that perspective.

I continue to notice more evidence of my Snap Shot working. My Snap Shot is “I’m a successful trader.” Evidence of it working is the calm I feel while following my system and being able to enjoy life outside of the market rather than feeling I must slave over the market to do well. It also gives me more patience and perspective and less medicating.

I give thought to my system vs. my System. Little “s” being this is when I buy, this is when I sell, etc. The big “S” being that plus many of the things in my commitment; the deliberate practice, experiencing feelings, tribe, family, and the environment at large. Thinking in terms of the big “S” System seems to result in greater ease of focusing on what’s most important, first things first, and less drama which affords me more energy.

Doing some tribe type work with my wife, we find a knot in her about <letting others feel let down by her>. It has the classic knot qualities to it…she does not let me feel let down by her and then I feel more let down like I’m not being heard and then it fuels from there. The knot gives her a blockage to harvesting criticism from me…criticism makes her feel she’s let me down. After experiencing lots and lots of anger towards her I notice a feeling of sadness for my wife and compassion…this is a very hard life to go through if you’re unwilling to leverage criticism…this is an AHA! for me as well.

From this experience, I notice I have a knot about being let down by those close to me. I hate the feeling. When it happens I flood with anger. Other feelings like hurt and vulnerability and sadness are blocked out. I hide behind the feeling of anger. This is a painful feeling that I recall in experiences from childhood from a mother that means very well but is emotionally incapable of loving, encouraging, being strong, touching, supporting.

Overall, I feel like I’m experiencing a positive upward spiral. Working into resistance gives me more energy to work into resistance. I am staying on the proactive path.

End of Q reporting: for Q2 ’10 I return 2.5%.

Thank you for your support.

Sincerely,
Thank you for sharing your process.
Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Crank it Up

Hi Ed,

When I am on the hot seat I like the work I do. I notice feelings sometimes, actually all the time, that I am taking too much time and that I should stop and let someone else go. I'm trying not to analyze it but rather simply witness it.

I also notice at times guys are saying 'crank it up' or 'turn it up' which annoys me. Sometimes there is nothing to turn up, the feeling / expression just is what it is.

Thanks,
Thank you for sharing your process.

You might consider taking your feelings of <annoyance> to Tribe.


Annoyance

generally indicates
successful motivation of the annoyer.
http://ashleydaniellerawson.blogspot.com/

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Meds Might cure be the Problem

Ed,

In this article, medical journalist and Pulitzer Prize nominee Whitaker discusses how the widespread use of psychiatric drugs has contributed to the increase in mental illness.

Tens of millions of Americans have been made crazy — due to their use of or withdrawal from psychiatric drugs. That’s the conclusion of two books written by award-winning health science writer Whitaker.

In his first book, Mad in America: Bad Science, Bad Medicine and the Enduring Mistreatment of the Mentally Ill, Whitaker explained the history of the treatment of those with severe mental illness, and the 600 percent increase in the disabilities of psychiatric drug-takers.

His latest book, Anatomy of an Epidemic: Magic Bullets, Psychiatric Drugs, and the Astonishing Rise of Mental Illness in America, documents the powerful forces behind psychopharmacology, and follows the money behind those forces.

Dr. Gary Kohls, reviewing the books in the Online Journal, notes:

“Psychiatric drugs, whose developers, marketers and salespersons are all in the employ of the giant drug companies, are far more dangerous than the drug and psychiatric industries are willing to admit: These drugs, it turns out, are fully capable of disabling — often permanently — body, brain and spirit.”

http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive
/2010/10/06/the-real-cause-of-americas-
mental-illness-problem.aspx
Thank you for the article.

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Tribe Report
Connecting with Family

Ed,

A tribe member’s Hotseat culminates to a point where he and his father share an embrace. They hug. I am moved by the event. I realize that I cannot recall a time where my father and I shared such an embrace or connected on such an intimate level. I appreciate my tribe member's willingness to go through his process.

I meet with my father and he agrees to try to feel. He starts to feel and his hands shake. He has a form with his hands shaking. He immediately opens his eyes and stops. He tells me that he used to be very sensitive as a boy, that he could feel how other people felt. He says that then something happened.

He doesn’t say what it is. He says that he doesn’t feel anymore because it’s too painful. He asks me what he should do. I tell him that I don’t know what he should do. I tell him that some people seem to connect with their feelings more when they close their eyes, and, that keeping his eyes open is a good way to keep from getting into the form and feeling. He tries again to feel and closes his eyes. He puts one hand over the other to hold it down and not go into the form, but fingers on both hands start to shake. He is resisting. He immediately shakes his body a bit and opens his eyes and starts talking to stop the process. He says there is too much guilt. He is emotionally disconnected.

He asks me if it’s OK that he can’t continue the process and feel. I tell him that it’s OK, that in this particular moment of now he is incompatible with the process, and that’s OK. He asks if other people can do this process and if other people can’t do it. I tell him that it’s really hard and that lots of people, probably most people, aren’t willing to do it.

We go eat dinner together.

I feel sorrow. Even though it is just an instant in time when he attempts to feel, I can feel his pain. I have empathy and understanding for him. I realize that intimacy requires feeling and that he is not willing to experience his feelings and, as a consequence, denies himself intimacy with others. I don’t know what happens to him that is so painful. I only know that at this moment of now, he doesn’t have enough willingness to feel. All I can do is accept him however he is, and accept that at this time, we are incompatible. I notice that I no longer have a need to make space in my life for people with whom I’m incompatible. It is sad. I feel sad.

My wife takes a Hotseat and gains new resources for feeling and communicating feelings. I notice less drama in her interactions with her parents, my parents, our son, and myself. It’s pretty cool.

I don’t get a pass on my project from the Tribe. This week, I notice that I get a feeling of “not knowing what to do.” It’s weird. I link this feeling of “not knowing what to do” with shutting down and not asking for help (the DIM process). I notice this and am able to reach out to get some assistance. I link this feeling with several decisions that I make in high school that mark turning points in my life. The weird thing is that all these decisions take place in the exact same desk in the same room in high school. My decision to drop Calculus, to drop Anatomy and Physiology II, to not become a doctor, to drop Physics II, to not show up for the National Honor Society meeting where I miss being elected president by one vote (I’m still elected Treasurer, though), to give up on any enterprise that involves math. I make some really bad decisions because I don’t want to feel “I don’t know what to do.” I stop doing any activity that gives me the “I don’t know what to do” feeling. I have a dream about sitting in the desk and feeling the feelings associated with my decisions. The dream seems like a dream (how weird is that?)—sometimes I’m sitting in the desk feeling feelings; sometimes I’m looking at myself sitting in the desk watching myself as I feel the feelings and make my decisions. I don’t know what that means. That’s as far back as I can link up. I don’t know what the primal event is. My wife agrees to assist me with TTP to go deeper and perhaps get some new resources. That is where I’m at now.

I appreciate the support of the Tribe and Ed.

Best,
Thank you for sharing your process.


With Fathers and Sons

... every event ..
http://www.laprogressive.com/the-media/
a-homegoing-for-my-father/


 ... can be an opportunity for intimacy. 
http://www.madeyoulaugh.com/index.php?page
=funny_photos/father_like_son
Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Ground Rules Conflict

Ed,

[A proper] name appears in FAQ entry dated 10/2, in conflict with ground rules.

I hope this message finds you well.

Keep Austin weird!
Thank you for the catch.
Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Tribe Report:
Sharing Feelings
Getting Closer With His Wife


Ed,

Please find attached tribe follow-ups for 9/9 and 9/23.

Thanks,

-----

9/9/10 Tribe Follow-up

At tonight’s tribe meeting a tribe member goes on the hot seat and goes through a process. The process deals with being a victim. There are a couple of points that I take away from this process:

1) It seems that “victims” are really just getting what they want which is to be a “victim”. There is something about this role that they want and intend to get. They tease and take risks that set them up with the chance to be a victim and experience that feeling.

2) If a person wants to stop being a victim they can do a couple of things. The person can deliver on their promises (i.e. teasing) or quit making promises they will not deliver. The can also lower the risks they are taking and make more sure bets.

After dinner I go on the hot seat. The hot seat started out discussing a business project that is not working out the way my vendor said it would. For 70 minutes I am in a very emotional and sometimes raw state. I am very amped up. After 70 minutes I am exhausted physically and emotionally.

We role play the suicide of my mother. I am there but I feel so drained. I feel like I am sleepwalking through the role play. We then return to the subject of my poor performing vendor. The big take away that I have at the moment is that I need to set boundaries and defend them. I get this chance to practice that with my vendor by telling them that they crossed the boundary and by demanding full restitution for the problems.

However, a much bigger thing occurred over the following weeks. I have a breakthrough with my wife. I finally have the ability to set some boundaries with her. I am able to tell her what I want. We practice sharing feelings rather than just giving each other a news cast of the day. I am not sure why but this hot seat helps me to open up to my wife and to ask her to open up with me. It is amazing that over the ensuing weeks we both notice that we are much more comfortable with each other. We both feel that our previous tendency to immediately jump into a defensive and antagonistic stance is almost gone. It is amazing the difference. I still notice that there are a few very sensitive feelings that I am worried about and scared to tell her. I am considering telling her and that alone is a huge leap because I would never have even considered that before now. I still have work to do but I am glad for the progress.


9/23/10 Tribe Meeting

We have the entire City Tribe visiting us tonight. It feels good to meet and share with others. We report on our projects and share our evidence for completion. I failed to meet my original goal. I feel disappointment and guilt about this. At the same time I feel very good about the process. It greatly improves me and gives me new skills that I had lacked.
I realize that while I fail to meet my goal, perhaps the real project was learning to experience frustration, anger, and to set boundaries. These are all things that I learn to do during this project. I feel good about being able to share my feelings. I am setting boundaries. I am feeling rather than repressing.

I still feel vulnerable sometimes sharing my feelings but I also notice that I feel stronger and freer after doing so. I also notice that it is getting easier and easier to ask others how they feel. What was once awkward is becoming a normal event for me.

During the meeting one of the [City] Tribe members goes through a hot seat dealing with their parents asking questions that the tribes member can’t or won’t answer. The role play is particularly enjoyable for me as I play the dad. At times we are yelling at each other and just fuming. I really feel like I am this person’s dad and that we are going after it. Once the tribe member starts practicing TTP things cool down, but as soon as they start to give facts or details or defenses it gives an opening and I amp up the yelling. It is interesting to see this cycle repeat several times until the tribe member figures out to stick to sharing and receiving feelings.

I gain an insight, that as the dad it was hard to discuss my feelings because there was one feeling that is the root. Until this feeling is expressed things are still on edge. Despite sharing and receiving feelings, it isn’t until the tribe member says they weren’t going to leave like their sibling did. That was the nip of the knot. Once this comes out the entire scenario defuses. I feel fear of losing my child. I realize that it is this feeling that I need to share and experience and until I share that one and receive the child’s feeling things were still edgy. After that feeling is shared a true connection is present and we move forward without the need to re-escalate. It seems that as the dad I wanted to keep escalating until that feeling was recognized and shared. The other insight I learn is that we need the other person to help reveal that feeling. Last but not least I learn that if I am still on edge and things still feel tense there is more there that needs to be shared.
Thank you for sharing your process.
Monday, October 4, 2010

Tribe Report -
Sticking to the System and
Changing His Diet


Hello Ed,

I attend the [City] Trading Tribe. This past tribe meeting I completed my project to trade a trend following system, program it on to a trading platform, back-test the system, and run a variance report. The tribe gave me a pass and I felt good about the fact that I had finished my project.

However, there were some issues that I fought through in order to get it done. I took the "hot seat" to feel these feelings and go through my process. Whenever, I tried to create or do something on my own I would hit a "wall" of emotions.

I would feel incapable, sad, and discouraged. I would find a medicinal way of coping with these emotions such as getting something to eat, going to a movie, or going out with a friend. In other words, I would avoid the feelings and the project would never be finished.

While I was on the "hot seat" I would get into the feelings that would come up. I felt the sadness and pain, the pain was like a burning sensation in my back.

Then the process manager, asked what incident in my past came to mind. I recalled a time when I walked in on an argument my mother and father were having. As I was walking into the room, my father was accusing my mother .... He said he wanted my brother named after him and looked at me and said that he never wanted me to have his name. My reaction was to shutdown and walk out of the room.

During role-playing, I learned the resource of expressing my feelings to my father and relating my feelings of rejection, sadness, and feeling of being unloved. I asked how he felt and he stated that he felt rejected, sad, and unappreciated. I expressed my love for him and he for me. We hugged each other in a loving embrace and I cried, glad to know that he loved me and that I loved him.

After this experience, I felt a little dazed and ,sort of, in my own separate world for about a week. I noticed a marked change in my diet. I used to crave sodas all of the time. Now I don't drink any sodas and stick mainly with tea, milk or bottled water. I noticed an improvement in my overall diet as well. I am also continuing to trade using my new system and taking the buy and sell signals.

Another tribe member took the "hot seat" and related an incident in which her sister left home while the parents were on vacation. When the parents returned they were extremely angry with her. They yelled at her, held her responsible for not telling them and berated her.

I can relate to this situation because my mother would get angry at me and have extremely high expectations as well. When I would bring home a bad grade from school, I would be severely chastised, even though the other grades were good. I would feel inferior and rejected. During the role-play, she would ask her parents how they felt.

They said they felt sad, hurt, and betrayed. Then the tribe member would express her feelings of sadness, anger, and rejection. This helped me to see how to handle the situation with my mother and to express my feelings to her and receive her feelings to help bring about more intimacy without all of the drama.

Thanks,
Thank you for sharing your process.
Sunday, October 3, 2010

Getting a Business Off the Ground

Ed,

This is my first report to my support team in four months. Thank you all for your patience and sticking with me.

As I am working with my associates in [Country] to mass-produce my iPhone plugin device, I notice a trend I like to follow. Mobile phones are subsuming single-function portable devices. Alarm clocks, GPS navigators, calculators, digicams are now software applications on mobile phones.

I wonder what other single-function devices I can recast as iPhone apps. I think of the UPS delivery man. UPS amortize development costs over tens of thousands of custom handhelds they deploy. Apple amortize equivalent development costs over tens of millions of devices they sell. The UPS hardware may well be 1,000 times more expensive than an iPhone.

I notice a particularly lucrative niche in this market: mobile applications that require external sensors. External hardware creates barriers to entry: few companies have expertise in hardware and software simultaneously. Selling hardware is also easier than selling ephemeral bits. People find it easier to relate to the cost of something that hurts if you drop it on your foot.

I file patent applications for a number of these devices, including a "crowdsourcing" radar detector which uses cellular communication to share the speed traps it finds with other drivers. My new bumper sticker is "smart peripherals for smartphones."

I am looking to raise $100,000 in private equity to develop and market these devices.
Thank you for sharing your process.

You might consider developing a pro-forma financial plan to assist potential investors evaluate their chances to make a profit with you.

You might also consider making sure that you and your clients your clients know and obey the laws that govern your speed trap app.

Sunday, October 3, 2010

Wants to Identify Trends

Greetings Ed!

With in current market environment regarding stocks and commodities, where information is gathered with ease and placing a trade is as simple as a click of a button. What systematic or mathematical method/s is there to identify price trends in these markets?

It would be awesome if the trading system project section of your website was finished.

Thanks for the reply Ed.
You might consider taking your feelings of <wanting someone to tell you the answers> to Tribe.

I am open to you and/or others to volunteer to extend the TSP section
Sunday, October 3, 2010

Tribe Report

Dear Ed,

At the tribe meeting of September 23rd, we present our final proof of completion, for our projects. I receive a pass from all the members, and I feel elated. I feel joyful. My project is to develop and implement a mechanical trading system, and to take every signal of that system. In May, completing my project felt like an impossibility. Since May, I overcome hurdles. I overcome my fear of math and computer code. I am willing to feel fear and feel confusion, and enjoy those feelings.

TTP helps me to remove the obstacles between me and my goals. Trading now feels effortless. I feel calm when I look at my charts and place my orders. I enjoy following my rules, regardless of whether the trade is a winner or a loser. I feel relaxed even when I have several losing trades in a row. I know the trends will come and I know I will follow my rules and ride the trends. I will catch the big wave.

Thank you Ed, for making it possible for me to be where I am. I can trade successfully and I can feel my feelings! And those are both new experiences for me. TTP is changing my life. My life feels more full, richer, broader, more complete.

At the tribe meeting we have our own tribe, plus the members of another tribe from another city. So we have two tribes in one room, and the energy is fantastic! I thoroughly enjoy the additional support and enthusiasm and willingness of everybody in the room. Two members go on the hot seat, and I am continually amazed by how much I learn and absorb from each hot seat experience. Every hot seat is intense and difficult and stressful, and I am grateful for every tribe member that goes through it. Because I learn from the work and willingness of my tribe, how to be a better father, a better husband. I see over and over again the power of sharing feelings and receiving feelings, and just how simple, yet difficult that can be. Every tribe member on the hot seat helps me to re-center myself, helps me to understand on a deeper level that intimacy is the path I must follow.

I continue in my own life to share feelings with the people around me. When I feel overwhelmed or frustrated with my sons (ages 6 and 3), I ask them if I can share my feelings with them. And I tell them how I feel. They listen to me. And the frustration melts away. It feels so right and truthful and sincere to share my feelings. I often wonder what the h--- I was doing in the past, without the resources of telling people how I feel, and listening to how other people feel. I still have a great deal to learn, and much work to do. I look forward to the work. Thank you again Ed!
Thank you for sharing your process.
Sunday, October 3, 2010

Reconciling With Father

Dear Ed:

At our last tribe meeting, I get into the feelings of my father not wanting a son, not wanting me to have his name. I associate my father's attitude with his not wanting anything to do with me. I am attached to my mother and my intimate relationship is with her. I have feelings of alienation, separation, isolation with my father. When I am yelled at, I submerge my feelings, become quiet and withdraw.

I have an encounter with my parents over an event that occurs on their return from vacation. They accuse me of not doing enough. I feel that I can never do enough to please them whether it is over an event at home, grades at school, or any endeavor I undertake. I have feelings of being violated, unappreciated, and not heard. I withdraw and become quiet.

I go thru two hot seat experiences this night at tribe. One is enough.

As I close my eyes and get in touch with my feelings, I hear echoes of my hot seat experiences. The first is with my father, but it is not my father.

The second is my parents, but they are not my parents. I open my eyes, a fellow tribesman is the one talking about his father, another tribeswoman is talking about her parents. Whose voice is original and whose is the echo! I cannot tell. There is no difference.

As we role play the first hot seat experience over "naming rights", the role player discusses her part in attempting to control her husband and a desire to be possessive of the her child. She discloses her contribution to the dysfunction. It occurs tom me that my issues with my father may not all be my dad's fault, he may be a victim along with me.

Finally, something I can share with my dad. I begin to stop blaming him. I call him, express my feelings and apologize to him, we are both victims. My mother, I view her with compassion, for I see that she too is a victim. There are layers upon layers, it is a systemic model.

I begin to accept feelings I have fought for so long. I feel mellow, there is forgiveness, understanding, and intimacy. I see patterns, recurring triggers, and familiar responses. There is a feeling of closure. I thank my fellow tribesmen and tribeswoman for their courage in confronting their issues for it has also allowed me to confront my own.

Regards,
Thank you for sharing your process.
Saturday, October 2, 2010

Exponential Lag

Hello Ed!

After 3 years, I've finally gotten back around to visiting the TSP and successfully duplicating the run! I am so happy! I have yet to incorporate ICAGR in my Excel Trading Platform but I'm very glad I'm going in the right direction and now understand the TSP.

Wanted to bring to your attention that inn the Exponential Average Crossover System page, How System Works section, I spotted a small error (I think) in..

"The system buys 6500 Units on 9/1/82 at a price of 119.535 and sells them on 12/20/83 at a price of 159.60 for a profit of 260487.50."

Whereas 119.535 should have been 119.525.

On another note, I was wondering what drives/motivates you to help people via this forum? What's in it for you? Not that I'm complaining, in fact I appreciate your help very much and wish you keep this up as long as you can : )

Your student,
Thank you for the catch.

You might consider taking your feelings about <helping others> to Tribe.


Sending and Receiving

feelings, thoughts
and an occasional helping hand

makes a lot of sense
in the intimacy-centric relationship model
http://changeagentgroup.typepad.com/innovate_rotary/
2009/07/serve-dont-help.html
Saturday, October 2, 2010

Mr. Seykota,

Greeting and how are you? I am from [Country] and after reading Mike Covel book -trend following -came across a lot of the top guru being profile and your was amongst those great trend follower. I was a swing or rather day trader and after reading up on trend trading - i became more interested in it then being the others. However as in these part of the world -there are not a lot of trend trader based here and esp the great like yourself. I was wondering whether you conduct any seminar on trend trading and how we as small "fish" can swim among the bigger fish or shark!

Please advice and look forward to your reply. Thank you

Regards,
See the link to the Workshop, above.