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FAQ December 21-31, 2013 <-- back | down | forward --> |
| Contributors Say | Ed Says | |||
Dec 31, 2013 Since your guidance on Sep 27, 2013 - Re: Frustration, Fred Magnet, I begin reading "The Trading Tribe" book again with greater awareness. I reach out to tribes closer to Melbourne and find that the nearest tribe is in Adelaide or Sydney. I speak to my wife about going to one of these tribes and she does not like the idea as she requires me to drive her around as she has a 6 day working week and does not know how to drive. The tribe member from Sydney encourages me to start my own tribe (through attending a workshop), but I feel uncomfortable with the idea and don't feel being ready for it. Meanwhile I allocate sometime for myself on a weekly basis and attempt to feel feelings, it seems to work sometimes and does not work most times. I look forward to work out some form of arrangement in the new year that will enable me to visit a Tribe. In the meantime I wonder what your thoughts may be in using technology to remotely attend a Tribe and what its effectiveness may be? I often hear a generic statement that exits are more important than entries, tighter the exits greater is the probability of being stopped out, wider the exits greater will it hurt on being stopped out. I wonder what your thoughts on exits may be, and how important they are compared to entries. Regards |
Thank you for sharing your process. |
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Dec 31, 2013 I just realize that I have some feeling to ask "how are you feeling" to non-tribemember, or outside of tribe meetings. It's weird. To follow up my posting on "Dec 24, 2013 Reconciliations", I am able make some major progresses on my work. Sometimes most obstacles are from inefficient habits, or Rocks. I need to do more tribe work to improve my efficiency. To follow up the http://www.seykota.com/tt/2013/Dec/01-10/default.html "Dec 7, 2013 Fear of Dentists", The dentist pulls my tooth, it's not as scary as I expect. My friend tells me his painful experience before I do my own extraction. He literally has two girls struggle to pull his tooth, with big scary wrench. I don't know how he gets into that situation. Maybe it's just his intention. |-). My experience is smooth and effortless, with a skillful dentist. My best wish for your well being and a happy new year! |
Thank you for sharing your process. | |||
Dec 31, 2013 Best regards, |
Thank you for your wishes. Happy new year to you and yours and to all. |
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Dec 31, 2013 |
Thank you for the link. |
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December 31, 2013 Hi Ed, I just pre ordered and had originally thought I would write to ask / offer: " Why not publish to Amazon Kindle and sell your books on Amazon ? If you would like help, I'll be happy to figure out how to do it and will be glad to help you do it. I think you will reach and help many more people." The above still stands, and now, as I write this I realize I feel more thoughts coming up and a number of string feelings. A sense of " big hug for Ed" is swelling like affection in my chest. It's warm and cold swirling - almost like crying as it moves up into my face. Thanks to the TTP process I have access any time to my feelings. Thank you. Thank you for creating and sharing the Tribe and TTP - I deeply respect your work and the impact it has on helping create relationships and results that are congruent. I've been involved with one Tribe or another in NYC since 2002 or so. Work with the Tribe feels like a continuation of a spiritual path that is firmly intertwined with the reality I experience. Feeling my desire to explain why we have not been doing the feeling work just now brings up the feeling of "excuses" tight throat, directly below ears, at the back half of my neck, nostrils flared, chin pulling back and down towards my collar bone. It feels like I am the big brother that has somehow transgressed upon my younger sibling. Consciously I feel the cool feeling pass up into my brain right side-- left side void in the middle with thoughts floating painted colored Styrofoam block letters , stiff, light, clunky, crumbly pellets rub off. Neck tight. I don't "like" to "lead" or be in charge yet I run my own company, always lead my peer group one way or another and just now know I'm going to take these feelings to the hot seat. Have not felt those fully yet. If you ever visit NYC and would like to join a meeting, we meet every Tuesday starting at 7PM at our offices (address in signature). It would be an honor to learn your processes first hand. Here are some thoughts are coming up now as well in no particular order: I wonder if you know of Willis Harmon or the Institute of Noetic Sciences? The work of Denise Shull really resonates with me and feels like TTP. She does an excellent job of referencing research that supports the types of results I experience from TTP work. Robert Fritz created a program in the early 80's called DMA. My mother taught the program to programers at CRAY Research when she worked there in the 80's-early 90's and to me when I was a teen around that time. Some of the processes also resonated with Snapshots Hardball and Hot Seat and I think they contribute to the ease with which I receive/send and actualize snapshots. You might like Fritz and and Shull too. Thanks again for contributing so much to my ability to create the life I want. Best, |
Thank you for sharing your process and for raising issues - and for your support. My work, on Bernoulli Abuse, The Trading Tribe and now, Govopoly in the 39th Day all challenge conventional wisdom. The life cycle of such pioneering work includes (1) resistance and derision, (2) early adopters, (3) acceptance and (4) others taking credit. At this point in the Govopoly life cycle, Amazon does not fit in with my marketing plan. I aim to gain some more experience with dealing with the resistance and derision phase. Then if the book takes off, and I sense a real market for it, I plan to employ all marketing avenues. ----- I do not know your associates. I gather we all hold similar notions.
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Dec 31, 2013 I wish you Merry Christmas and a happy non-existing 2014! Best, |
Thank you for sharing your process. | |||
Dec 31, 2013
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Thank you for contributing. | |||
Dec 31, 2013 Even More on SVOp - see previous previous previous Dear Mr. Seykota, thank you for teaching me how the govopolistic powerplay style (patronizing and ridiculasing others, breaking rules you profess) works by exemplifying it in our communication. Gratefully |
Thank you for sharing your process and viewpoints. | |||
Dec 30, 2013 Dear Mr. Seykota, I guess a 7-year old will rather understand that "Matter is energy" than your reasons for a misplaced lecturing on the causal ambiguity of your favorite physical phenomena. Happy New Year |
Thank you for sharing your process.
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Dec 29, 2013 FYI, here is another related, later book by the same author: http://www.amazon.com/Myth-Robber-Barons-Business-America/dp/0963020315 The Myth of the Robber Barons describes the role of key entrepreneurs in the economic growth of the United States from 1850 to 1910. The entrepreneurs studied are Cornelius Vanderbilt, John D. Rockefeller, James J. Hill, Andrew Mellon, Charles Schwab, and the Scranton family. Most historians argue that these men, and others like them, were Robber Barons. The story, however, is more complicated. The author, Burton Folsom, divides the entrepreneurs into two groups market entrepreneurs and political entrepreneurs. The market entrepreneurs, such as Hill, Vanderbilt, and Rockefeller, succeeded by producing a quality product at a competitive price. The political entrepreneurs such as Edward Collins in steamships and in railroads the leaders of the Union Pacific Railroad were men who used the power of government to succeed. They tried to gain subsidies, or in some way use government to stop competitors. Regards, |
Thank you for the link and information. Some writers divide entrepreneurs into two groups: the Govopolists and the Free-Market guys - and implicitly assume permanence - that once in a group, a guy stays there. In Govopoly, I present this dynamic: as an economy develops, the Govopoly System assimilates the economy, and the Free-Market guys with it. Young bucks start off entrepreneurial; once they make it to the top, they seek alliances with government to stave off the new crop of young bucks. Hill, whom you continue to cite, certainly starts off as one of the more entrepreneurial guys of his era - cutting costs, improving quality and beating the competition. Later on, he forms alliances with central bank progenitors, such as J.P. Morgan. For a more recent example of this dynamic, you might like to observe the evolving alliances and affiliations in Silicon Valley. The term, Robber Baron, generally refers to people who create industries by serving large numbers of people better than others can. The choice of the term "Robber" confers prejudice useful to politicians who wish to regulate and extract benefits for themselves. |
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Dec 29, 2013 More on SVOp - see below thank you for elucidating SVOp-b style in your posting from 12/27. I understand that SVOp-b helps to tell some things with more clarity, responsibility and liveliness. In mathematics the equal sign relates 2 sides of the equation, so it does not have the proper meaning of the verb „to be“, which is to tell that ONE thing exists or not. But in physics you need the verb „to be“ in its proper sense to communicate its findings. I can´t imagine that by using SVOp-b you could better formulate the findings of physics that „Time is relative“, "There is no absolute space" and "The matter is energy". With regards
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Thank you for extending this issue.
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Dec 29, 2013 I think I have a basic concept of MARR ie. Max % Drawdown/Annualized % Gain. How do you adjust for additions and withdrawals? |
Thank you for raising this issue.
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Dec 28, 2013 Merry Christmas! I'm wondering if you sold out of the first print run of your book or if you're on vacation until January 15th. Either way, or whichever way things happen, scarcity of product may increase demand. [My son's] new bed-time reading is now Govopoly. I have concern that he may not understand the book, that is until page 11 when we read "Declining Trends" and "Rising Trends," and [he] states, "We have it backwards. We want the things that are declining to be rising and the things that are rising to be declining." I'm not concerned now. For what it's worth, Govopoly trumps Harry Potter. During [my wife's] reading time with him, he requests Govopoly in lieu of Harry Potter. Govopoly being in competition with JK Rowling's book and winning in the seven-year-old market is pretty cool. Perhaps the sample size of one is insignificant statistically, but it's still pretty darn cool. All the best to you and your family, |
Thank you for the report and for reading with your child and for telling me your 7-year-old son likes Govopoly. I write for 7-year olds - of all ages; I hold they can understand most things if you explain them clearly. Also, they have little inhibition about telling you if they find something boring. I receive an early shipment of books in mid-December, 2013 - so I can keep my agreement to have the book to some early birds on the 100th birthday of the Fed. I expect the bulk to arrive in a couple weeks.
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Dec 28, 2013 I just receive the Govopoly book and I am enjoying reading it. I feel excited to see I am in the photos in the book. My meet-up group has 5 members now after online for only 2 days and I am planning a meet up soon to introduce TTP to community friends with interest in self-growth and psychology. I am not trying to grab people in. I just provide an interface for people who are ready to plug in. I commit to do my part to extend the Trading Tribe culture to local community, in a more pro-active way. My tribe member and I are ready to start a new TT meeting session soon. Thanks, |
Thank you for sharing your process. | |||
Dec 28, 2013 Habit Upgrade - Yorba Linda, CA Chief, I got two member join the meet up group the first day. Free Habit Upgrade, YEAH! Thanks, |
Thank you for sharing your process and for creating and managing your group. | |||
Dec 28, 2013 Newbury Tribe Update - Knot Knowing Two Newbury tribe meetings take place since my last update. I also attend a Breathwork workshop. I am an experienced breather with 14 breath work sessions under my belt. My intention for the Breathwork weekend is to explore a tingling sensation I feel in my cheeks - I feel this for quite a while and I wonder why? I take the tingling in my cheeks as my intention to my two Breathwork sessions. I complete the Breathwork and notice the positive intention of tingling in my cheeks. Tingling seems to occur when I am not in the now and I now welcome the tingling as a warning. I also conclude I have a "knot around wanting to know" and decide to take this to tribe as an entry point. The two Breathwork sessions leave me feeling unusually vulnerable, fragile and raw. Following my Breathwork workshop I immediately return to a brutal work schedule. I struggle to cope and feel like I am drowning again. The regular bi-monthly Newbury Tribe comes around on Sunday. At the start of the meeting I feel very emotional and fragile and ask my friends if I can take the Hotseat. I am very vigorous on the hot seat and immediately curl up into a ball and rock like a scared child. I feel the fear of too much work and failure and my own drama around "drowning". Encouragement and drumming from my friends push me through this fear. I start to feel tired of being sorry for myself and feeling fear. My feelings show me I can be strong. I beat my chest and heart area and I experience empowerment. I take back control. I bang my chest like a gorilla as it feels really good to take back control. I go with the banging until exhausted. My friends now encourage me to bring it all together. I rock like a baby and beat my chest....suddenly I feel like a dolphin playing in the waves of work. I duck under some waves, over the small ones and through the big ones. I suddenly notice the waves never end like my work. I feel getting through work might be fun if I am more like a dolphin. I laugh and smile as I play at being a dolphin. I have an "Aha" - I choose how I respond to the waves of life even though I can't stop or control them. I feel lighter and easier following the Aha. I also feel more comfortable "knot knowing" - suddenly my Breathwork and hot seat experience come together. Stay in the now, go with the flow and don't worry about knot knowing. My friends both have intense hot seat sessions and, surprisingly to me, we all share issues and fears around lack of control and "knot knowing". Three hours ends and we are all amazed at how we have created a safe and trusting space that allows us to be with what comes up. In this meeting we all take turns at process management and our confidence grows once again. Thank you Ed. TTP is working some magic in Newbury for the three of us. Happy holidays and all the best to you and your family. Regards |
Thank you for sharing your process.
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Dec 28, 2013 This treatment of Vets with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, called Prolonged Exposure Therapy, sounds related to TTP, in the sense that the therapy encourages the patients to feel the feelings they might otherwise avoid and repress. The War Within: Treating PTSD [begin excerpt] Eric Collins: Depression, anxiety, anger, worthlessness, guilt all those rolled up into one. Scott Pelley: Guilt? Eric Collins: Survivors guilt, why me? Why am I alive? Why are they not? That’s one of the hardest thoughts to deal with, you know? Eric Collins was wounded in a rocket attack in Afghanistan. Over a year, 17 of his buddies died. Scott Pelley: How did you cope with these feelings of anger and depression and guilt when you first got out? Eric Collins: Alcohol and lots of it, that's where it started off. And the alcohol led to my depression worsening which led to more substance abused. Crack cocaine is my drug of choice. So my whole life spiraled downward out of control. To take control, Collins volunteered for one of the new therapies called prolonged exposure. It forces him to work at remembering every detail of what he’s tried to forget. [Eric Collins: Next thing you hear a loud boom, my ears start ringing. And wake up, open my eyes and I'm on the ground…] Doctor Kevin Reeder runs the program. [Kevin Reeder: How are you feeling at this point? What were you, what were you feeling at that time? Eric Collins: Anger. I'm scared. I'm feeling pain, my leg, my back, my arm, my whole body. Kevin Reeder: OK, let's go from the beginning. Gotta keep doing this. Eric Collins: The next I know I hear a loud boom…] They call it prolonged exposure because Collins will relive the story of the attack five times a session. There’s a tape running and he’ll listen to the memory throughout the day to break its power. Scott Pelley: Tell me about prolonged exposure therapy. [Dr.] Kevin Reeder: They've done everything they can to push these memories away. In the process, they haven't gained a full realization of the impact and the meaning that these stories have in their lives. I like to use the term we're staring the dragon in the eye. Scott Pelley: Where do these therapies come from? Kevin Reeder: A lot of these therapies came about with survivors of physical or sexual abuse. Those types of traumas. Scott Pelley: What are the similarities? Kevin Reeder: The symptoms. The symptoms. The avoidance, the isolation, the hyper vigilance, extreme anxiety, the irritability, inability to sleep, nightmares, same thing, different sources, but same thing. Eric Collins: I can’t move my legs, can’t move my arms… Scott Pelley: What does that do for you? Eric Collins: It helps me to get past the guilt, survivor's guilt. And that's a building block. Every time I get through it I get stronger and it helps every time. [end excerpt] |
Thank you for the information. | |||
Dec 28, 2013 I see the book, I want to help socialize it. Current ground rules prevent me from Tweeting images like this: Therefore, I am hereby requesting formal authorization to Tweet images (for example, this one) from this page, so that I can help socialize your writing and ideas: http://39thday.com/Peek/index.html Regarding Govopoly, here is a story of a man who irritated and provoked Govopolists to action, by being too good at creating value, while refraining from sucking up to government: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/James_J._Hill
Book: I look forward to the opportunity to purchase your book. Kind Regards, |
Thank you for sharing your observations. |
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Dec 27, 2013 Dear Ed, I came to visit the TTP website after months of being away…too long, I might add. The first place I went was to the Resources link, and there, to my glee, was reference to your long awaited new book! My order is in for a copy and I can hardly wait to get it. It is my Big Present to myself for the year 2014… I read the Peek… SVO-p After Reno Work Shop I am changed forever, for the Better, and I am so grateful to you, Ed, for that! I download a few years after Reno, MIT Systems Dynamics courseware (in 2013), print out and organize it into binders, order associated books and dig in. Fairly soon I hit Rocks (Molecules Version of Vinsim software), but not before learning essential basics of system dynamics. I sense aloneness, but also freedom and empowerment. I engage politically around 2010. My candidates lose. I work on Spence for Governor Campaign in MO, and Nixon is re-elected, but Spence runs well, I think, for an unknown albeit successful entrepreneur. Along this path I make many new friends, and they are my friends today. I get a nice Christmas card from Spence family. I am invited to speak to a group, the local “conservative” club, on the topic of Quantitative Easing. I accept gladly. In two months prior to engagement I read every day on the subjects of monetary policy, watch films, go to Kahn Academy , re-read The Creature from Jekyll Island (thank you, Ed!). My talk goes very well according to those attending and I am grateful for their feedback. Earlier this year I attend a presentation sponsored by the conservative club and begin learning about a concept, a political philosophy, called self-governance. The speaker, and several of his students, inspire me to attend his five level course and learn more about how government actually works, and how to participate at a higher (lower) level than simply voting. I complete two levels, loving it, as I learn more history and philosophy, this time focused on origins of the American political system, the Constitution and republican form of governance, a person named Mrs. Powell, and begin to place Anarchy, Oligarchy, and Republican forms of governance in perspective. I learn about power regulation and administration and new ways to think about it and act on it with fellow citizens. More can be found here of this course that grows in popularity around the country as concerned citizens seek ways to “fix it”: I study Locke’s Two Treatises of Government, carefully read Aristotle’s Nichomachean Ethics, and I try to make sense of the world we live in. I read large swaths of Caro’s biography of LBJ, particularly Path to Power, and find there a country turning from free enterprise to socialism, FDR taking young LBJ under wing, and I see the tides shift around in the depression and post depression America, all the while remembering the formation of the Fed in 1913. I worm in my gut is my sense that I have limited time and I feel my age at 56. No rest for the weary sends me over and over to the gym to sustain myself and stimulate positive endorphins. I find a wonderful source of workouts I can print off instantly every day at a website built by a former Navy Seal…this site is www.SealFit.com and the workouts are of a form similar to cross-fit training. I re-learn simple pre-workout meditation and 4x4 breath-work. This really helps my workout focus and durability! I learn there is no “I” in team. My head sometimes swims. SVO-p teaches me how to help my 18 year old son that we live in an ever evolving now. He senses my sincerity and love. We struggle as he and I attempt to bridge the many decades between my boomer generation and his millennial generation. He gets a copy of Fahrenheit 451 in his stocking for the second time. I continue to trend trade in my way as I have adapted what I learned from Ed, Covel, and others I study. I blend “funny-mentals” with observing charts, cut losses quickly and let winners run, attempting to maximize trends. I am still a one way trader, not shorting, and this is an area that bothers me. So far, I cannot reconcile myself to options, or commodity contracts. On the bright side my client business grows and I have not blown up, nor have my clients. I think of the Round Tuit. I contemplate what Ed says about avoiding “to be.” In the Peek of Ed’s new book, Govopoly, on page 28, I realize I am one of the few. I tell anyone who will listen this is not about partisanship. I like Ed’s term Govopoly better than the terms I have been using, corporatism, crony capitalism, state capitalism, fascism, though to my mind these terms have their place as well. Back in high school, in 1975, I take a course in environmental science. I do not have the courage or confidence to study Chemistry, or Physics, and though this hurts my ego, I am treated to one Dr. Ed Johanningsmeier, who earned his PhD from MIT. He takes us on field trips and teaches us the importance and interrelatedness of the ecosystem(s). Ed Seykota’s reference to “Duckweed Takes Over” rings so true with me. I look forward to receiving your new book in January. Happy New Year, Ed! Warm regards, |
Thank you for sharing your observations and links - and for making the effort to connect with your son. | |||
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Dear Mr. Seykota, I peeked through the Govopoly on your site. I am amazed one can write a book without using the verb "to be"! I feel this style has a profound impact on me as a reader. I try to figure out what is its mechanism. Can I ask you why or how have you decided to dispose of the most frequent verb in English? Thank you if you clarify this. |
Thank you for raising this issue. SVOp-b stands for Subject, Verb, Object, in that order, in present tense minus the verb "to be". In [A = B] the equal sign invokes the assignment of the value of B to A. Strictly speaking, in neither case does A equal B.
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| Dec 25, 2013 Helicopter Pilot Delivers Christmas Trees |
Thank you for the link. | |||
Dec 25, 2013
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Thank you for the link to the master. | |||
Dec 25, 2013 A hug |
Thank you. Merry Christmas to you and yours - and to all. |
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Dec 24, 2013 I find that Rocks Process has unusual power to move everything around me in my favor. Recent month after I join Austin Tribe and introducing it to my local tribe, my trading, trading research, work, family all go very well, without conscious effort. Now I block again at my work. I am doing a high expectation and visibility project (A firmware on 64 bit ARM microprocessor) and an issue blocks me. I have the feeling to enter holidays with a unfinished business. All other parts of my life are perfect, and I might be able to carry a historical high open profit in my account to the new year. Yesterday is the last working day before my holiday break. I bring my such feeling to my hot seat, i.e. the toilet seat. My tribe is not always around, so almost everyday after I get to the office, I do a little short DIM to sort out what is the major feeling I have entering the day. I do it in the bathroom, on the toilet. Today I get into the feeling of not making any progress on the job, and hitting lots of walls everywhere. I close my eyes on the toilet seat and start to rock back an forth. Then I feel some rocks in my heart area. Tight, heavy, metal and awkward. I hear a voice, "stuck here", "Sigh". I recall this is the voice of my best childhood friend, [Name]. Then I recall that when I was 10 years old, I swim cross a big river with my best friend, and another bigger kid. That's the first time we dare to do so, and the flow in the middle of the river is very fast. We want to cross the river and reach a small island in the middle of the river. We do it secretly without any parent's knowledge. Otherwise we face spank. When we pass the half way, the flow becomes much faster, and it looks like we are going to miss the island. If we miss it, what before us is a wide open body of water and the bank is even farther away. I start to feel fear. Then I hear [Name] calling my name with trembling voice. I look back and see that he is scared too. I want to go back to help him but I am afraid to do so. I look forward, the older friend looks at me and keep going (the rock donor?). So I just answer his call and still keep moving forward. Fortunately we all reach the island. But I feel guilt, regret and letting my best younger friend down. I feel I am coward and selfish. We are still the best friend. And I feel there's a lot things in our life where I leave him behind. I really feel sorry and guilty. I realize that I am feeling the same way at my work, I am in fear of letting people down. The higher management count on me to make breakthrough and the marketing people are waiting for announcing our new product to support the 64 Bit processor. I acknowledge my feeling and identify my rock. I don't have the tribe with me in the rest room so I end the process and go back work. I hope that someday I can start a company and running a tribe among engineers, we embed the TTP into every part of the business. So I can call for a rock process right after getting up from the toilet seat. I send [Name] a Christmas greeting and he replies. I feel I really love my friend, he is like my little brother. Thanks, |
Thank you for sharing your process. |
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Dec 24, 2013 I wish you and all my fellow Tribe members and FAQ contributors a merry Christmas, and I would like to share this video that celebrates with the amazing music of the human voice: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qJ_MGWio-vc&feature=player_embedded Sincerely, |
Thank you for the link. | |||
Dec 24, 2013 My flight is late and I miss half of the meeting. I suppose to arrive at Austin at 1:00PM and end up after 7:00PM. It is an agony to sit in the terminal while the tribe members in Austin already start drumming. I feel anxious, frustrated, hungry, meaningless, angry. Later I think whatever I am experiencing, it's part of training on my way to be a better trader. When I ring the bell, the meeting is already halfway for the first hot seat. I pick up that, the entry point for the client is that he feels blocked at his work. Through form development, tribe bring him to his early memory where his grandma often smothers him. He feels out of breath and terror. One tribe member plays the grandma and use pillows on his face make him feel hard to breath. The client feels his body is his private property and she invades his property without his consent. Tribe conduct "fore-giving" the shutdown rock and hand him a heart rock. When we role play again, the grandma won't back off when client shares his feeling and keeps approaching with the pillow. The client eventually raises his voice and threatens to bite the nipple off his grandma. He tells the grandma he learns this from Austin Tribe. Later in the meeting he feels confusion where he get this from. Or whether his process is complete, or it just opens a new layer of experience. Through tribe sharing, tribe realizes the that heart rock has a sharp end, and sometime we need it to set boundary and protect ourselves from predators. The second hot seat has problem with a business man on his farm. He decide to fight this guy for everybody in the town hate that guy. He ask each member's opinion. And many members support his decision. It's a process without role play and form development. Sometime I get lost to the complexity of the business matters. My only feeling is that the tribe member and his neighbors all hate that guy. Somehow I feel today's meeting both end with something not usual to our normal conclusion, i.e. sharing feelings and let things sort out. The two processes may connect to each other and they may not. Every tribe meeting is different and this is a special one too. I feel lucky I catch at least half of the meeting and it pays off sticking to it. Thanks, |
Thank you for sharing your process and for documenting the meeting. | |||
Dec 21, 2013 You ask the Austin Tribe members to submit a report on the effects of the Tribe series on their lives. I cannot say what exactly "causes" my life to change dramatically in the past six months, since everything affects everything else, but I can say without a doubt that my experience in Tribe is a significant factor. I come into the Tribe series without direct experience of TTP. I quickly try to find my place by orchestrating my own rocks process in advance. I bring my own rocks, pre-labeled, and think I know exactly what to do with them. Happily for me, the Tribe is supportive but unimpressed by my efforts. I believe that my major rock ("Hold Back") is really a key element of my functioning, but I also believe that the way I attempt to "work" on it completely reveals my problem with needing to control my experience in the world. Again, happily, the Tribe setting is a relentlessly validating and accepting environment in which to become aware of myself and my issues. I see this demonstrated over and over again with every member who takes the Hotseat. Towards the end of the series, I am diagnosed with cancer. Seemingly out of the blue, I decide to start a You Tube channel and post a video each day to document my experience of my treatment. My Tribe experience leads me to feel that it is safe to express myself openly and I feel shock to see how easily I do so. To be completely honest, my experience in Tribe also gives me hope that males are serious about wanting to share feelings. I "know" that intellectually, but I feel very happy to see it demonstrated in "real life". Furthermore, I am clearer now about the ways that women say they want men to share feelings, but in reality may not receive the feelings that men are actually expressing. I am now much more comfortable noticing my own non-receptive communication instead of simply focusing on the other person and wondering how to "get" them to do what I want! The most significant and useful learning from the Tribe series is the contrast between intimacy-centric and control-centric communication. I of course still get these two mixed up, but find it much easier to recognize and recover when I do. Thanks again for introducing me to this life-altering experience. Sincerely, |
Thank you for sharing your process. | |||
Dec 21, 2013 I thank you for your support. I think of you all and send you my best wishes and warmest regards. Warm regards. |
Thank you for your regards and wishes. | |||
Dec 21, 2013 Ed, I have a strong emotional reaction weeks after processing this. I feel anger, sadness, and hurt when I recall being pushed away emotionally by my father and feeling the need to seek a father/son bond with other men even though my father was physically present in my life. I also recall feelings of being ugly and not good enough. After I cry a bit and release built up emotion I also wonder about my spouse and how uncannily she assumes the roles once occupied primarily by my mother and or father in certain interactions. An example of this is revolves around work/career. My mother always preached stability through a job, my father lived the example of stability through his job/career as a teacher. From very young I wanted to have the freedom associated with being an "owner" not an "employee". Ironically my wife has assumed this role of projecting "stability through being an employee" and I feel stuck going forward with entrepreneurial projects or finding a "stable career" and pleasing her. In my mind I logically reason I can use one to get to the other but I FEEL I have to choose against two conflicting decisions. I make progress in one choice but then get stuck. I have feeling of wanting to please my wife in spite of it going against what I may want career wise. I have noticed through this process I have 2 consistent forms. A pressure building in my sternum that feels like water or air filling up the space in my chest to the point of a burning suffocation and a burning sensation on my arms that I recall are identical to the lingering burning pain after disciplinary whippings handed out by my father. |
Thank you for sharing your process and for raising these issues.
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