Jun 30, 2013

Rocks About Rocks

Hi, Ed,

On the way to the second Austin tribe meeting I begin to feel nervous and don't know why. My nervous feeling increases as I get closer to the meeting location. At check in, I experience a tingling sensation on the right side of my body from my right eye down. Later in the meeting the tingling sensation stops on my right side and switches to the left side from my left eye on down. By the end of the meeting the tingling sensation is gone.

I take this nervousness and tingling sensation to our local tribe. We begin, and I go into a form feeling my arms pressing to my sides. I relate to form to several scenarios in my life. I stop, throw a plastic water bottle into the hallway, and leave.

As I'm leaving, I realize that I don't want to leave and am just going off an auto response of some sort. It's all a bit fuzzy. And I leave all the same. I drive for a bit and realize I'm having some difficulty focusing on driving. I decide to return. The tribe is waiting for me and we resume the meeting.

They know the scenario and are in the process of reviewing all the steps in the rocks process so they have all the steps down and can help me.

We discuss the fact that my current rocks help ensure that I don't do the rocks process. We agree that's pretty much the case with the really tough rocks. We discuss that we witness many people use TTP to a point where it gets really tough and then they stop. And that sometimes they convince themselves that either TTP doesn't work (or at least not for them or their particular issue) or that they are OK and don't need to do a rocks process and all the while it remains obvious to everyone else that their rocks are actually preventing them from dong the rocks process and using TTP. It's a powerful feedback loop.

I go into the form and find the rock donors. My father gets angry and breaks things, sometimes me, and my mother doesn't talk and leaves. We go through the rocks process and it is difficult. We go through a scenario, one of three that come up where my father breaks things and my mother responds by leaving just before the breaking begins, and I share feelings with my father before he gets violent. I notice this is extremely hard to do. The tribe member playing the role of my father reports in the rocks checkout that she feels him not knowing what else to do and is glad that I stand up to him and can share feelings. I, however, don't have a sense of resolution. I'm left cooking a bit. This "cooking" is made more intense by the realization that I cannot attend the next two Austin tribe meetings to get completion. I'm left to cook, which must be what I want.

The part of the rocks process involving my mother proves even more difficult because she keeps leaving right before we begin the process. Just before my father gets angry and starts to break things, she is out of the room. We keep doing the role play and I have to time it where I start to share feelings with my mother before she leaves, but she only pauses to hear me, then she still leaves. The tribe member playing my mother states, "She doesn't talk, she just leaves." He is right. He is playing the role of my mother perfectly. We do another role play with my mother, but it doesn't really work. I'm still cooking on that one as well. At the least, I make progress in identifying specific rocks, their donors and forms.

I realize at the Austin meeting, that I feel nervous and cannot really talk or find it difficult to talk—just like mom. I also realize that as soon as I'm able to leave, I leave—just like mom. I notice that I feel relief from the tingling sensation in my body in direct proportion to my leaving—if I leave, I don't have to feel the feelings—leaving is my medicinal response to not feel—just like mom.

This sucks.

Jun 29, 2013

Bonding

Ed,

You are a f--king genius

Jun 29, 2013

Trading Tribe Process (TTP) Report

Hi Ed,

Thanks for hosting another Austin Tribe meeting.

In this session, a tribe member takes to the hot seat his issue of "not feeling good enough". He reports feeling this way in various areas of his life. We implement the rock process. Hot seat recalls a specific incident in high school when he is playing wrestling with a friend and another classmate calls him names. Hot seat medicinal responses are to shut down and to tweak people later. At this point, hot seat reports that he does not see himself ever sharing feelings with this specific classmate

During the process, we identify hot seat's mother and sister as the rock donors. We role play the incident. Hot seat accepts the medicinal rocks from the mother and the sister. In the next role playing, hot seat has the opportunity to forgive the rocks. The mother and sister offer their rocks to hot seat simultaneously. They both speak at the same time. However, hot seat in a calm and decisive way tells his sister that he first needs to talk to his mother. First, he forgives the rock to his mother. Then, he goes back to his sister and forgives her rock. Immediately, he receives another rock with proactive responses such as sharing feelings and asking for feelings.

Finally, we role play the incident one more time. Hot seat has a chance to use his new proactive rock. This time, hot seat does what he previously thinks as impossible. He shares feelings with his classmate.

Next, I volunteer to take the hot seat. I first hesitate to raise my hand as I already take the hot seat the previous meeting. However, this might also be an excuse for not working on my issue. I take to the hot seat my issue with disappointment.

I share with the tribe a situation when I feel disappointed and sad. Last week I participate in a half marathon. My sister tells me that she plans to go to the race with my niece and nephew to cheer me up. During the race, I do not see them. After I finish it, I feel sad and disappointed with my sister for not showing up. This type of situation and feelings are familiar to me. Actually my sister goes to the race but we just do not see each other.

I start to recall situations in my childhood when I feel sad and disappointed when my father does not show up. I show some forms and the tribe encourages me to go with them. Then Ed asks me to freeze the forms. I recall a specific event in my childhood. I am spending the weekend in my father's house. On Saturday morning he tells to wait for him that he plans to come back at 5 PM to pick me up. We make plans to go for dinner. I wait for him and he does not show up. The next day when I wake up, I find my father drunk lying in the sofa.

During the rock process, we identify my mother as the rock donor. We role play the event. It is 5 PM and I am excited to see my father. I keep waiting and he just does not show up. Then, my mother "spirit" shows up with a "disappointment" and "sadness" rock. My father just does not show up.

At this point, Ed tests my willingness to continue with the process. I might try to derail the process so I end up feeling disappointed. The tribe gives me the OK to continue with the process.

We role play the event. This time, I have the opportunity to forgive the rock to my mother. During the forgiving part, I have a hard time when my "mother" asks me where I plan to find the replacement for the medicinal rock. I feel compassion and a sense of understanding when she tells me that this rock is all she has to deal with these situations. I finally forgive the rock to her. Immediately, I accept another rock with proactive resources such as sharing feelings and asking for feelings.

Now, that I have a new rock, we role play again. I make plans with my dad and he does not show up. The next day, I find him in the sofa. I ask him if he wants to listen to my feelings. I express my disappointment and sadness. I ask for his feelings and he tells me that he feels depressed and lost with his life. Although I feel a bit uncomfortable with him as he is still intoxicated, I feel compassion. He uses alcohol to deal with his feelings.

We role play one final time. I make plans with my dad. I ask him how he feels about keeping his agreement with me. Curiously, this time he shows up at 5 PM.

Finally, I have the opportunity to role play the original situation with my sister. This time I feel free and comfortable making clear agreements with her. I ask her if she really feels like going to the marathon on father's day. She expresses interest to attend with her husband and kids. We set a specific location and time. I also tell her what I plan to wear so we do not miss each other.

I have a friend with whom I previously make ambiguous plans multiple times always using text messaging. He sends me a text message during the week to go play racquetball during the weekend. I immediately call him and tell him that I would like to play. However, I do not like to make plans using text messaging with him. I ask him that if we schedule for Saturday afternoon how he feels about keeping his agreement. He could not continue talking so he hangs up quickly. He calls me the next day to ask me to play on Saturday. However, I tell him that I already have plans with a girl friend to go out on Saturday. I have a good time and enjoy the conversation with her.

I want to thank you Ed for managing my process and all the tribe for the support. I feel grateful.

Best,

Jun 29, 2013

Financial Success

Hi Ed,

Today, my bank account tops $100,000 for the first time. This is after
paying vendors, contractors, tax men, ex-wife and myself. This is a
significant milestone for me. I feel proud and a little bewildered. For
the first time in many years, I am running a surplus--and first time
ever on this scale. At the beginning of this year, I ask myself: if
business goes as well as it is now, can I squirrel away $100,000 by the
end of 2013? Six months ago it seems an ambitious target. Six months
later it is reality.

We each walk our own paths. I feel gratitude for the part of my path
that trails yours. I learn much from sharing that part of my journey
with you. Thank you for walking with me Ed.

Jun 27, 2013

Trading Issues

Dear Ed,

I have been a regular reader of the FAQ for a number of years but writing to you for the first time. I really appreciate the way you are helping others in the community.

I feel sad, scared and listless as write this email to you. I also feel a burning sensation in my stomach as I share this.

I find myself once again not following my trading system.

It has been a regular pattern in my trading and in life - I win in the beginning, I get aggressive and then I lose because I fail to cut my losers. My small losers become big losers and then I feel depressed.

Intellectually, I know how much to risk, entries, exits etc but fail to honour my system.

Incidentally, this is a pattern which runs my life - I start a task with enthusiasm but never find the energy and discipline to finish it. And then I feel depressed till I find a new project to repeat the pattern.

Today, I feel a loner and fighting my own battles. I feel committed to excelling in trading but feel uncertain and fearful about the future of my life due to this self destructive behaviour.

What can I do get out of this situation?

Thanks for all your guidance and help.

Regards,

Jun 26, 2013

Ranch Abs

Ed,

Two Six Packs

This picture reminds me of Psalm 91:4, He will cover you with his feathers. He will shelter you with his wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection.

June 25, 2013

Not About the Nail

Dear Ed:

You have to watch this video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-4EDhdAHrOg

Jun 25, 2013

Picker

Ed,

Jun 25, 2013

Wants to Contribute to Trend Following

Hi there,

I have just recently started researching trend following techniques and have become very interested in learning and contributing towards the development of trend following.

I would like to take this opportunity to request membership to a tribe. I am currently a portfolio manager at a quantitative asset management firm in South Africa. Please advise how I can move forward. I look forward to hearing from you. Many thanks

Regards

June 24, 2013

Breathwork Report

Ed,

I went to a Breathwork event this weekend and really enjoyed it.

It was a group of 12 of us & 2 had already done some breathwork

I experienced what I would call Grof's archetypal realm: Intricate glyphs & hieroglyphics.

Some of the glyphs had central openings with "blue sky" on the other side.

I tried to "go through" but didn't succeed.

I'll try again.

June 24, 2013

Workshop Discounts

Hi Ed,

I wonder if there are any special discounts for international graduate students in the US who are not allowed to get paid legally. I want to attend your workshop in Austin, TX from September 13th to September 15th, 2013. I also wonder what the payment deadline is.

I also want to attend the Breathwork workshop as a TTP workshop graduate in September 27th, 2013 at the TT Ranch.

I thank you,

Jun 24, 2013

Trading Tribe Process (TTP) Report: Falling Asleep

Dear Ed:

I notice myself constantly falling asleep at the meeting. I tell myself that I am tired as I did not sleep enough the prior night. A little later I am wide awake. The process repeats.

I try to figure out what my tribe members are saying - which might be causing me to fall asleep but I fall asleep again, while I am still trying to figure this out.

Later I use a new device based on EMDR.

I realize that I have 2 ways of dealing with conflict. One is to fall asleep. I feel better afterwards. The other method is to get mad and then fall asleep.

I've been told that I am oblivious - so I could be constantly tuning out things around me - and going into mini sleep cycles.

I will bring this to the tribe to explore further.

After the meeting one of the members wishes to simulate death. We go with the flow and assist him in this process. After the simulated death experience, the member experiences intense joy and freedom. I watch in awe as the process unfolds - its one of the peak experiences in my life.

Hi Ed,

My second Tribe meeting leads me to several interesting personal developments.

First, I arrive with the awareness of feeling very good about where I am in my process, so that I do not experience any distress or strong feeling of "need" to work on a particular feeling I am having (no "need" to "work on" a feeling of "feeling good", right??).

However, during the interim since the last meeting I have many thoughts, feelings and memories that I know I want to deal with.

I have found several rocks that have meaning to me and I bring them to the meeting in a bag that I place behind my seat.

I am clear that I am feeling ready to work, and vow that, if nobody else emerges with more urgent concerns, I will volunteer for the hotseat.

Then, during check-in, a new member who was not present at the first meeting plunges immediately into spasms of intense emotions. This seems briefly to stun the group until we decide to go ahead and help intensify his development of a form.

As it becomes apparent that there is not a particular issue that is driving his outburst, I am aware of feeling vaguely irritated with him (as I write this, I recall that, ironically, the initial memory he reports is of his mother scolding him).

I feel like scolding him and am uncomfortable with this feeling.

Next, the member who remains incomplete from our first meeting reports and completes his process. I quickly volunteer for the role of the "little sh--" who tormented him as a child.

I notice how much I enjoy role playing, perhaps especially the aggressive roles. It gives me permission to be spontaneous and even encourages me to hurt someone's feelings without having to be "responsible" for the damage. Hey, I am "helping" him by hurting him! However, our completion of the role-play with bonding and a healing of the damage feels very important to me.

Ed then asks if anyone else has anything that they want to work on. Immediately, the member who worked on feelings of shyness and embarrassment at our first meeting speaks up and claims the hotseat. This is clearly progress for him, and I am happy for him, as well as slightly disappointed (and possibly relieved) for myself.

Again I volunteer to play a role and notice how much I enjoy the freedom I feel to be spontaneous without having to "watch my step".

At check-out I declare my intention to take the hotseat at our next meeting. I use the term "put my quarter on the table" and then immediately say, "It doesn't have to be first in line." I now think, "Actually, I am first in line. I spoke up first, I said I want to work, I am going first!" I wonder what will happen if someone tries to cut in front of me in line. I am no longer willing to yield my place.

I also tell the group I feel less engaged than I have in the first meeting. I now realize that I am engaged, I just don't like what I am engaged with: a feeling of irritation or disagreement with something that is occurring. I feel this way several times during the evening, and the feeling leaves me uncomfortable. This is completely consistent with what I have to work on when I take the hotseat.

Like the director of a movie, I can see the entire process unfold. I know the scenes I want to enact, I have my rocks labeled, I know which Tribe members I want for which roles. I also feel that I may be challenged as being "bossy", which I assure you is not the first time I have heard that!

I am aware of, and excited about, the fact that something entirely unscripted may occur. I know this is not a DIM process because I can't feel the feelings when I think about it by myself. My tears and fears are ready to emerge on cue in the safety of my Tribe.

I love this process and am incredibly grateful for the opportunity to release the ambivalent bonds that HOLD ME BACK!

Yours truly,

Jun 23, 2013

Wanting to Help Them

Dear Ed,

Your readers say they want to be more emotionally present in their significant relationships. I feel moved to share this link with them because I want to help them achieve their desire to make the special woman in their life happy (hopefully along with themselves).

From the woman's point of view, I can assure you that most women will say, "I would absolutely love him to do that but there is no way he would really want to." And so we don't ask because we presuppose that it's "too much" to ask, and of course, that covers up our fear of rejection as well.

Yet it is a win-win situation even if it only leads to a mutual sharing of feelings about whether it is indeed "too much", or even about what each of us wants in general. As you so often point out, it is the process we engage in that creates the change, not our thoughts about the process or even our actual attempts to change our behavior.

I, for one, plan to have this conversation with my special man, at least after I nag him repeatedly to read the damn article!

Sincerely,

Jun 23, 2013

Believing in a System

Hi Ed

I have decided on my system and on the 4 markets that fit into the system.

However when not sticking to the system!. I found that I put on a number of discretionary trades on Eur / Usd during NFP. I lost money. No plan no idea

Feelings of elation and despair and having let myself down. When not sticking to the plan.

However when sticking to the system which I have been doing on the rest of the markets I trade. Pleasant feelings are happening. Feelings of sticking to the system.

Feelings of doing something right when sticking to the system.

I enjoy sticking to the system having back tested it. But Trading for real with ups and downs really does test one's resolve and belief in the system.

I am following Mark Douglas's exercise from 'The disciplined Trader'

To learn the skill of flawless execution by learning how to follow the rules I have set out in my system. To incorporate belief in my system by taking every signal. Regardless of the outcome. Because the nature of probable outcomes is that some of the trades will lose. However over the long term I will come to a belief that I will make money in the long term.

Part of the exercise is not to be too hard on yourself.

Regarding feelings of anger, I felt angry at the weekend about going to the Theatre to see a play. However accepting the feeling of anger. I felt better about going to see the play. And I thoroughly enjoyed it. TTP really works.

Jun 23, 2013

Trading Tribe Process (TTP) Report: Dealing with a Bully

Ed,

I attend second Austin tribe. This time I travel to the tribe meeting with a friend and we are able to get to know each other much better and communicate many of our wonders how much better the intimacy model works when used. I am grateful.

We begin our session and a member needs to express his feelings. We attempt to go through the Rocks process with him but he is unable to give us a specific memory to role-play. It feels to me this member is very expressive and so much wants to be free to play and be completely open. There is nothing the HS really wants to change. We encourage him to find avenues to play and get the attention he wants. He may want to consider acting or focusing on expressing feelings all the time may be just what he desires.

The second HS was the open issue of 'not measuring up' from last session. I am on the HS and I try between the sessions to work on the issue on my own. It becomes apparent I am not focusing on my feelings and basically was telling a story about what I was trying to do which had zero to do with my feelings. Once Ed pointed out I was in story telling mode, it helped to refocus me and get into the process.

I get into some forms and with Ed's help an incident comes up that I remember in high school. I am play wrestling with another student and another boy who is actually jealous of me but has been successful alienating me from friends and says, "easy, chicken legs" while me and the other student are wrestling for fun. A couple of other students laugh but they meant no harm when doing so. It is my process to basically ignore the comment and act like nothing happened but it did bother me and I still think about the incident more than 20 years later.

In the Rocks process it feels to me to me the perpetrator of the incident is really not that important. The HS is only reacting to the person by the way he learned to handle the situation. Ed begins to probe my thoughts on where I learned how to react the way I do. I gain my rock form both my mom and my sister. During the rocks process I have two rock donors that try to each give me a rock to get through a situation.

Having a rock donor on both sides of me can feel overwhelming, I turn to my sister and ask permission to only speak to mom first with a commitment come back to her to discuss feelings. I notice I am able to focus on the one donor and to be able to share feelings together. Once, I have forgiven the rock back to my mom, it was easier but no less intense in forgiving the rock back to my sister.

With my new rocks, I role-play the situation I recall from high school. Before we began I state the funny and impossible thought that I would be able to share feelings with the student that was so good at bullying or more precisely knowing just how to tweak me in school.

During role-play it was very easy and felt comfortable expressing my feelings and listening to his feelings. The rocks process has the ability to change a person in an instant if it is the desire of the HS.

As we work through processes, one thing I keep coming away with is gaining a sense of sadness and understanding for many of the people we play during role-play. They have issues that cause hurt, these people are frustrated overwhelmed, lonely and are at times doing the best they know how with the resources they have. I am hoping my continued work in TTP allows me to be more accepting and patient with other people.

June 21, 2013

New TTP Series

Hi Chief,

We are setting up a new TT meeting session, starting from next Sunday. We have 4 members attending and total 4 meetings, running every Sunday for 4 weeks. We work on Rocks Process.

My backtest / trading system can run multiple strategies simultaneously on multiple markets now. It takes me a while this morning to find out a bug in the order processor class. I no longer depend on Tradestation or other platforms for my research. It seems to be a right decision to design my own platform.

Thanks,

Dear Ed,

June 19, 2013
Sharing Feelings Away.
Ed Says:
Father and Daughter get to have the relationship they create.
June 18, 2013 Amsterdam Tribe Report: How To Change Your Parents
Ed Says : Changing Them starts with changing you.
Wow. So profound. So true.
A Fundamental Investor (me I am talking about) 1 Jan 2000. What can a person who is a trend trader teach a fundamental investor?
1 Jan 2012. Fortunately that Funda guy was not suffering from strong ego anymore! So he starts reading FAQ and starts benefiting from it. Thanks Ed.
Ed knowingly helps people come closer to their close ones.

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Feel like sharing my feelings.
In investments and Trading I want to be alone. Not in my life! In life I want to be surrounded by people who I love and who love me. Wow! What a feeling. What an awareness. What a realization!
Your guidance and posts are helping me become a better father.
Change now starts with me!
Thanks!

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Me: Let me sleep!
Brain: NO! Lets stay awake and introspect every stupid decision you made in your life.
Me: Oh no! Not again! Okay. Okay. I take positive intention of Oh I made a mistake and I now feel good that I now Know.
I feel more and more.
I start reading FAQ!
I now start understanding more clearly What Ed says and has been saying. At last!

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Feel like sharing.
5 Ws have worked for me: Why, When, Who, Where and What.
I find myself asking me what is on my essentials list?
What is it that I really really want?
How come the person who has scored 96% in Maths in the tenth does not have answer to many of his own questions?
I find reflecting back on my life.
I feel like a brain alive, feelings shut down (dead) in past. I also notice having ego.
On a daily basis I now focus more and more on my feelings. I take their positive intentions.
Thank you

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Ed visits J.W. Forrester Concord, MA, June 8, 2013.
This reminds me of my own tutors and how important role they played in my life. Their dedication, care and commitment to their students helps their students become knowledgeable.
I acknowledge their important role knowing that they (most who have passed away) may bless me from heaven.
I am their good student and they are my amazing tutors. Both dead and alive.
I like to acknowledge Ed's guidance.
I am enjoying my weekly meetings with my son and they surely are helping me. And Him.
Thanks.

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Feel like sharing the benefits of what I learn through FAQ.
I notice that not wanting to feel my feelings has run my life all these years.
When I go back in time, I notice that I succeed even in the absence of anybody's support during my young age. I notice that though I did not receive support, I always crave for it. Always.
When I read recent Sacramento Tribe Post, I feel the feeling of going alone and succeeding but at the same time I also notice feelings of abandonment in my life. It makes me feel sad. I take positive intention of this feeling and now like to invite more supportive people in my life. I share my feelings more. People open up and share more.
Thanks as usual to a person who I have never met and who continues to guide.

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Feeling my feelings and taking their positive intentions is helping me become a better person.
I now become easily aware of my many actions, intentions and thoughts.
Ed says Intention = Results. Ed says Everybody gets what they want.
I fully agree with you.
I become aware of my childhood tendencies to take up a task - project, focus on it and then finish it at the earliest and feel very good about it.
This same tendency helps me start reading FAQ (of the year 2003) from Feb 2012 . I notice that I easily benefit from it. In 2013 I come to know of rocks process.
OMG, so much to learn. So much to know. So much to feel.
It is good that Ed is carrying the flame from his teachers to his students. This is helping so many all over the world.
Thank you for being such a wonderful person and guide.
Along with Warren Buffett and Charlie Munger, Ed Seykota has easily become my guiding hero.
I am glad I have choose my heroes right.

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Are emotions feelings? Your view please.
Feeling my feelings helps them come on the surface.
I see them and take their positive intentions in the present moment of now.
I start reading a book One Minute for myself.
I reflect whether I have been running faster in the wrong direction many times.
I feel I have.
I feel I know Mr. Market. I know EFGH (emotions of fear greed and hope).
I now feel I can know myself if I put in quality time and efforts.
I take positive intentions of communicating with Ed regularly. I wonder if it is OK with him.
Thanks again.

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I feel I am moving away from asking questions to sharing of feelings. I feel great.
Transformation seems to be WIP.
There are likely to be few questions and more sharing of feelings in the non existent future.
Thanks for pushing me in the direction I needed to go.
Take care
Best wishes with thanks

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Examining my feelings. I love exams.
Feeling my feelings brings them to surface and so I can see them clearly without any biases or judgments.
During 2013, I start sending emails to Ed. I check why. I realize I need to become wise. I want to become wise.
My idea is to know What Ed knows and is willing to share.
My intention is to increase my awareness levels, learn and benefit from what Ed shares.
My intention is to become a better person.
I like to know what is missing in my life. I start liking this feeling of wanting to know what is missing. It helps me bring in clarity.
Day be day in some ways I am becoming better.
Instead of Ed, can I call you Chief? Pl inform.

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Feel like sharing.
In the present moment of now, I become aware that I can learn a lot from Warren Buffett, Charlie Munger and Ed Seykota. I like this feeling.
By paying proper attention (my intention) I start realizing Warren's investments success easily (the result). I realize his investments key immediately during his visit to India during 2011.
Charlie's rationality is being grasped.
Above all this, what is most important is my feelings.
I learn about feelings from Ed. This is the most important aspect of my life.
Life is an emotional experience. Life is a feelings experience.
When I feel my feelings, I open up many doors. I feel good. Feelings are becoming my strengths now. I smile.
I notice I have not paid attention to my feelings (by shutting down) but that is changing very fast now.
Ed's suggestion of starting my own TT scares me. Many questions arise. I do not feel I am capable. I take positive intention of feeling not capable.
Income Tax commissioners and Chief Justice reside in my building. They may consider TTP as a cult following. They surely will not understand what it is all about and so will not allow me to conduct these meetings.
Neighbors may notice shouting, screaming and crying of a TT member on a hot seat. I live in a peaceful locality. Birds sounds are welcome. TTP might be taken as something not welcome by most. Neighbors are likely to object from the beginning.
Is there a way out? As of now, I feel the confusion and take it positive intention.
Can Ed please guide?
There is a book Damn Right on Charlie Munger. I hope there is a book on Ed also.

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In stock market, I understand which companies are awesome.
I now understand that my feelings are also awesome if I take their positive intentions.
I strive to know my own self. This is opening the floodgates. I welcome them.
In past I used to ask myself: How can this happen to me? Why did this happen to me?
By living in the present moment of now, these questions dissolve and feelings start coming in. They throw better light. They bring in more clarity. I now know more about what I need.
During yesterday's flight I meditate and a very young air hostess feels that I am scared of flights. Scared of plane landing. She can not control her laughter. I open my eyes and notice her laughter. She is trying hard not to laugh but she can not stop. Many passengers notice her laughter but do not know why she is laughing so much. After the landing I walk towards her and thank her for laughing and making us laugh. I notice twinkle in her eyes. She asks me whether this is my first flight. I inform her that I am a frequent flyer and that I was meditating as there is no one beside me. She smiles beautifully. She reminds me of my daughter and I call her.
I smile more often. I share more often. I notice I am becoming better. FAQ has helped.
My emails to Ed are likely to slow down a lot as I have already shared a lot about my feelings and Ed has been kind to share and guide generously.

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I come across a Marriott Hotel Manager, single, separated and of my age.
She starts calling once a week. She shares her feeling that she feels that she looks very pretty. I do not comment.
Once we go for a walk. Again she points out to me that she is very beautiful and that her relatives praise her beauty. She expresses her feeling that she feels good that she is beautiful. I again do not pass any comments.
I receive her patiently but feel scared. Why is this person focusing on just outer beauty? Is she playing any drama? What sort of drama is she playing? Does she want to involve me in her drama? Why? I feel these feelings and feel confused.
I start feeling that if I receive her more, she may start feeling that I like her. She may then find reasons to call me more. I get the feeling that she may then feel I like her. I stop receiving the way I do.
What is the right way to receive people?
Any views or guidance from Ed will be appreciated.

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I have hopelessly felt the feeling of missing something all these years.
What is it that I have really been missing in my life? I find myself asking this question. Now I feel it. Feeling helps.
I take their positive intentions and understand their meaning. This helps me to understand myself more. Thanks.
I now surround myself with supportive, caring and loving and trustworthy people. I reciprocate.
I acknowledge my feeling of not wanting to associate myself with people who make my stomach churn. This helps reduce dramas.
I am being influenced by Ed in a positive way.
I feel good.
I now know what I like and love.
In past thoughts pass at the highest ever speed! In past they cause turbulence and turmoil. Now I take their positive intentions and benefit from those feelings.
I read Victor Sperandeo's (Market Wizard) book Trader Vic page 192. I start looking within.
I read TTT book page 91. Ed says: Show me what is standing between you and your goal.
This is the most effective sentence I have ever come across about goals. So simple and so profound. Thanks Ed for such a clarity.
I start realizing the rocks that I carry. More the realization more I do drop them (rocks).
Oh God. Why have you not made humans more rational? Another question dissolves into ...
I start gifting books I no longer need. My big library is becoming small.
I keep best of the best. I feel good.
Ed, Through email to you I share all the stuff I collect since Jan 2013.
This was the last one I feel like sending you from what I collect.
I feel good that I send all that I collect. Finishing this email and sharing my thoughts makes me feel good. Makes me humble to some extent.

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I am benefiting a lot from your relies.
I am taking a break from posting on FB group and from sending you emails from next week. There r about 5 pending emails to you. I hope there will not be more!
We in our group are benefiting from FAQ. I have recommended your site to few interested.
They all are fundamental investors and have been doing research.
Few of those have quit their jobs and are doing their own investments.
Your concept about Feelings is helping all of us. Rocks process we are discussing.
Everybody gets what they want is the best sentence we have come across.

Thank you,