Puerto Rico Tribe Application

Hi Ed,

Please find my application for the Puerto Rico Trading Tribe commencing January 22nd, 2015 attached.

The prospect of additional Tribe work with you, opportunities to work with you and your tribe on system design as well as an opportunity to contribute towards an effort you are also participating in is a tremendous and exciting prospect.

I have the feeling of being a student, open to learning and suspension of judgement. I also have the feeling of energy and momentum building.

I contemplate and discuss joining the PR tribe with my wife [Name], we review dates and I prepare the application. [She] offers me very clear and unequivocal support and generous assistance in reviewing the logistics of my existing commitments. I experience traces of the ramifications of support and the Tribe everywhere in my life and relationships. I imagine working with the [City] Tribe and with you and the PR Tribe, traveling to PR, a jam session with drums and a banjo and moments of connection, insight, emotion and depth with new and familiar friends.

I very much want to contribute towards and participate in your Tribe.
I feel tremendous respect and gratitude for your wisdom and generosity and for the influence your work has had on my life.

Following up on an earlier FAQ submission:

Initially I have many fears of missing and out when I see the short note on FAQ " Puerto Rico Tribe begins Jan 22, write to FAQ for details"

Many other feelings race through my body and mind.

The first feeling is the most powerful:​
I feel excited, exhilarated: I am joining Ed's tribe, I have a lot to offer.
The lifting up and out feeling oscillates and turns downward and in.
I feel an empty friction and internal noise.
I feel a depleted echo: I can't afford to go.
I feel trapped, the back/bottom walls of an empty stomach: I can't get away from work.
I feel guilt/regret fear of disappointing,a swallow in my throat: I can't miss my after-school or weekend time with my daughter [Name].
I feel anxious, heart races and chest tightens: Will [Name] be OK with me going and alone with the boys? Will she support my going?
I feel insecure, left out - Open throat, furrow between eyes, lips thin and pressing together, nose tight breathing in, nostrils irritated: What it Ed decides not to invite me to join or the timing does not work out.

One by one I experience and share the feelings and find a proactive response to each.

A few days later I find additional details about the new tribe and complete an application.

I find that I take all the appropriate steps to facilitate my participation and feel a sense of pride in a job well done. I have willingness to participate, willingness to make commitments and willingness contribute.

Thank you. ​

Best,

I want use the simple crossover em a 120-30 strategy,

i want to buy when the 30 ma is above the 120 ma

and sell when the 30 ma is under the 120 ma,

what do you think about this strategy?

How can determine the right bet size for this system?

and how many market can i trade in the same with this strategy?

thank you

Have a great evening!

PR Tribe Series

Ed,

would you be so kind and send me the information regarding your up-coming Tribe?

Hope you are well,

Sincerely,

PR Tribe

Ed,

Thank you for providing more details on the PR Tribe Series on FAQ.

The opportunity sounds awesome!

My understanding is: (i) ten Tribe meetings on Thursday, (ii) ten trading labs on Friday, (iii) personal research in between meetings and (iv) publish research findings.

I wonder if you can provide additional insight into (iv). This brings up irritable feelings of wall street research reports.

In gratitude,

Please find the up-dated Florida, Orlando Trading Tribe Document Attached.

After months spent in dormant state the tribe is awakening once again and with four members start meeting on February 5th, 2015.

Sincerely,

Tribe Meeting Report

Hi Ed,

Tribe meets as scheduled on Tuesday at 7PM.

Five members attend, myself included. Two of the members are new to our Tribe. One of the new members has been part of other Tribes and the other new member is also familiar with TTP.

Two regular members are unable to attend.

I open the meeting with introductions and by stating my intensions for the group and for the meeting.
​
I share an abridged version of the topics covered at the workshop, describe the TTP "tools" and processes.

After we introduce ourselves, I ask if everyone would like to try the intimacy centric relating exercise:

We set up chairs in two pairs facing each other and begin the exercise.

Senders are on one side facing receivers who are on the other side.

Part 1 - Tell me what you are thinking
Receiver: "Tell me what you are thinking"
Sender: "Shared thoughts here"
Receiver: "Thank you"

Alternate roles, repeat the exercise for several iterations, check out on the process.

Part 2 - Tell me what you are feeling
Receiver: "Tell me what you are feeling"
Sender: "Shared feelings here"
Receiver: "Thank you"

Alternate roles, repeat the exercise for several iterations, check out on the process.

Part 3 - Show me what you are feeling
Receiver: "show me what you are feeling"
Sender: Feelings shared via form(s)
Receiver: "Thank you"

Alternate roles, repeat the exercise for several iterations, check out on the process.

By the end, I pull up a chair to join the process and we perform the exercise taking turns asking the person to our left ​Show me what you are feeling, Feelings shared via form(s), collective thank you.

The results were great.

To be continued... Time to feed the kids dinner!

Thank you.

Jan 7, 2015

Abandonment

Ed,

I wrote these words to myself today. I write them to you now.

I wonder what the positive intention of abandonment is?

With gratitude,

-----

[Name],

I realize now I have abandonment issues. Abandonment plus boundary issues is a driving force in my adult life.

During the response delay from my recent em ails to FAQ, I experience many feelings and a day of emotional oscillations.

My imagination runs wild for the day projecting many mental scenarios generating feelings of rejection, dejecting, disappointment, sadness, anger, fear and self-righteousness. After I think through a "worst case" scenario, my emotional oscillations subside.

In a Tribe meeting I recall once saying, "no response is a response." My father used that phrase and technique on me growing up. I recall feeling dejected and worthless then as now.

I go to bed accepting this drama as self-created. Early in the morning I awake to numerous short, rapid fire HD movies playing in my mind. My mom leaves me at my Aunt's house. My mom disappears in a grocery store. I am left in the car at the grocery store. My dad abruptly leaves for business trips. My oldest brother abruptly has to go into the Army. My mom never attends any of my baseball games. My dad attends, but watches from his car at a distance. My mom stops preparing me lunches for school. My mom stops washing my laundry at an early age. Many more recollections than I can recall now.

I fully awake feeling abandoned and alone.

I read and resonate with much of this.

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/the-many-faces-addiction/201006/understanding-the-pain-abandonment

I realize now I re-create that environment for me to live in. I know exactly how to operate and feel in that environment. I have been creating that environment for the last 30+ years of my life.

I feel lost at first, so many lost and misdirected years. I accept the feeling and it begins to fade. Feelings of relief develop, "at least I know about it now."

I want to create a new and better environment. I know it is changing. I feel the change. I feel the feelings of abandonment. I write these words.

Thank you for receiving me.

I was emailing tribe group in London on the email published in directory.
Nobody answered for a 2 months.

I wonder does any Tribe group still exists here at all ?

Thanks,

I am reading a past posting "Sat, 12 Apr 2008 Feelings and Disease - Three Actual Cases" and your comment on details of Rock Process.

Recently I tend to downplay the Rock Foregiving process and focus more on role playing new Rocks.

Your comment "This tends to implement the learning in the emotional body, as well as in the logical mind.", seems to imply that the procedure of Rock Fore-giving has more physical / practical impact than it seems to have, independent of outright role playing of pro-active rock.

Role playing an past incident is already a indirect way to tackle present issues, and Rocks Forgiving gives another level of indirectness. Or just another element of the system. One I neglect. I am thinking of more exploration of this matter in coming local Tribe meetings.

I start to feel challenge to perceive the whole picture when you further dig into the stack of issues. " In this way, <disappointment> may be medication for intimacy issues and <cough> might be secondary medication for <disappointment>.",

I feel I can understand, or image what it leads to in a straightforward logic sense, but feel some frustration to grasp the whole picture about it.

I can vaguely know what it means.

It might have something to do with my recent conversation with my wife on some petty issues. Even I try to receive her and encourage her talk on her feelings, our conversation goes nowhere and then I just feel my true love to her and tell her my love. This makes us both feel happy.

The love and the issues seems to be unrelated. I can't understand the missing links or modules in my psyche. I wonder if this case is related to what you mean in your comment about the stack of medication on top of deeper issue of lack of intimacy? I might have a big entry point on feeling of intimacy.

I haven't seen such detailed case study and interpretation on Rocks Process on the FAQ for a while. It's a good reading.

Thanks,

It has been years since we last spoke, but I wanted to wish you a Happy New Year full of health, happiness, and hopefully some nice market trends.

You were (and still are) instrumental and inspiring to me in my journey to trend follow for friends and family in my managed futures fund. I just finished my 6th year of trading client capital, and look forward to trading for many years to come. I even recently did a podcast with Michael Covel which was a fun experience.

The last drawdown took out many trend followers, many of whom I looked up to. I wanted to write this email to you to thank you for not throwing in the towel and sticking to your system of helping others (including myself) via your Trading Tribes and website. I wish you nothing but the best moving forward.

Take care,

I wish you a happy year and I hope that you and your beloved ones are in good health.

Regards,

Dear Ed,

I love the new picture of you jammin' in the New Year!

Even though you live in the Tropics now, I feel happy to see your dress represent good ol' Texas attitude and style.

I wish you continued happiness and jammin' in 2015.

Just to follow up on my report on feeling sadness when eating less food, I acknowledge the feelings, write about them to FAQ, go to bed and wake up this morning with less sadness, a lower weight and more optimism about life.

I notice today as I attempt to eat less food I feel a deep sadness, like a loss or deprivation, and also I feel agitated, like I need soothing.

I wonder if that's what makes weight management difficult.

I get my divorce on 29th Dec 2014 after lots of struggles and complains in the higher court against the presiding judge.

My both adult children opt to reside with me. I welcome them wholeheartedly. They are back with me.

Litigation cost me millions.

I cherish the wisdom shared on FAQs. Questions and your views and answers helps me make rational decisions.

I start listening more and more to my inner voice and pay more attention to my feelings.

Thank you and lots of best wishes and hugs to you Ed.

Hi Ed,

I hope all is well

I was wondering if you could send me details of the meeting you are having this month.

Thank you.

Ed,

Lesley Stahl profiles British musical savant Derek Paravicini, whose computer-like memory for music is matched by his creative abilities to play it in any style.

Derek, a nephew of Camilla Parker Bowles, is a musical genius, who doesn't know his age nor how to hold up three fingers. Also, he is blind.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/Ak2jxmhCH1M

I'm excited by the prospect of your upcoming Tribe and Tribe work in Puerto Rico. I would like to participate and be part of your tribe.

Please let me know your criteria for joining and expectations for the Tribe meetings and schedule.

Side note:

A lot of feelings came up for me when I noticed the notice at the top of FAQ.

I'll send them separately for FAQ.

Thank you for pointing out that opening one's eyes during sex can have a variety of results, perhaps depending upon both people's intentions.

However, I don't believe that the eyes "project" feelings; I can attempt to project a feeling with my eyes, but the message that is received really depends upon the projection of the receiver.

For example, perhaps unwittingly, in your response to my letter (Dec. 23) you use a graphic that depicts a woman who appears to be suffering from Grave's disease (enlarged thyroid, bulging eyes).

Someone observing her, particularly while having sex with her, might indeed be alarmed if they were not aware of the actual circumstances.

Her partner could feel judged, inadequate, and/or repelled by what her eyes "project" when in fact she could be feeling many different things.

As always, if you don't share your feelings you risk making assumptions that completely influence what happens next.

The core lesson I receive from my exposure to TTP: share my feelings despite fears about the outcome, and be open to what happens.

Thanks so much for that!

Relationship Model

Ed,

I am curious, does your model of attraction and closeness model relationships where a partner has extreme behavioral characteristics like Dr. Jekyl and Mr. Hyde and feels strangled and suffocating when in any relationship for all their life and prefers solitude while other times very loving?

I've recently classified that in the insolvable bucket.

I thought love was strong enough to conquer but I think now it isn't.

I thought if one partner acted as a model and was constant in love, that things like closeness would develop and one partner would feel safe and happy regardless of what happened in their childhood.

Instead it seems like trying to make a milkshake with milk and lemons.

I'm leaving [City] today for[Country]. The snow has been beautiful the last 3 weeks!

Hope you had a lovely Christmas and New Year break!

Puerto Rico Tribe Series

Ed,

I notice you are hosting a Trading System PR Tribe starting Jan 22.

I feel surprise, delight and fear at the same time.

I align with my inner voice and ask to join.

May I join?

Thank you for asking.

Cheers,

More On Measuring Orgasms

Ed,

Thanks for input, fyi I am looking to measure it for commercial purposes. When I have the business plan together I will send you a copy.

Happy new year and congratulations ...

Recently I am re-reading the archive FAQs. I read all of them couple years ago when starting doing my local Tribe. When I did it, somehow I skip all the trading/TSP related posts and focus only on feeling/TTP related posts. Now I am reading them again but doing the opposite by focusing on the TSP and system design posts

But I find I can't get away from thinking about the feelings when reading and considering issues on system design and trading. Especially your comment on the post on Tue, 11 Dec 2007, Drama With a Trading System.

I find the way I design and think of my system still has a lot to do my rocks. It's interesting I am a perfectionist whose intention is to delay to get what I want. I find lots of things I can bring to the tribe.

Thanks,

I love this picture. It describes some family dynamics in a very precise, elegant and laconic way.

Control-Centric Family

http://www.e-neurocapitalhumano.org/ imagenes/circulo_odio.jpg

I remember my famliy working like that. My poor children...

Right now, I prefer this other familiy dynamics.

Intimacy-Centric Family

http://karmatruck.files.wordpress.com/2013/03/care-family-hands-heart-love-favim-com-201857.jpg

I wish you a wonderful, peaceful, successful, loveful and stressempty 2015!

I love you, Chief. My son says that I am a different person now, and you and the Tribe made it happen.

Sincerely,

I made 13% in 3 days earlier this week on 5,000 Australian dollars.
My win/loss ratio was 44% and I did 54 trades.

I am hoping to build my capital to around 200 - 300K so can buy a small unit or house in the country in a few years time.

Before I also made 150K in 4 months. And then I started to gamble and thought I was going to make a million dollars in one year. I then got frustrated and basically lost the entire 150K I made. So I am back to basics again.

Regards,

AHA! From Control to Intimacy: Accepting the Other

Dear Ed,

I want to share my recent AHA! experience with FAQ readers, because I feel very excited about it.

I have told myself for a long time that I feel "willing" to listen the feelings of my partner. Yet, at crucial moments, I seem to fail and the conversation becomes contentious.

I tell myself that he must be the unwilling one, and that he pushes me away. Yet I feel that he "accuses" me of not wanting to hear his feelings, as if it is all my problem. I know I want to hear his feelings!

I struggle with this problem. I again ask him to share his feelings, and he does so in a very blunt and unvarnished manner. He tells me his feeling that I am continually trying to steer our relationship in a direction that I want it to go, that I always calculate and try to control the meaning and impact of his feelings on our relationship. I suggest alternative explanations if I don't like what I hear.

He says some very harsh things about my communications in a recent encounter that I "know" are not accurate. I feel wounded, angry, I wish he could see how he is projecting feelings onto me that aren't true! I'm not like that!

Suddenly my mind opens up and a veil lifts from in front of my eyes. I realize that it doesn't matter at that moment what is "true" or whose vision is "correct". It matters that he feels these feelings and that he is taking the risk of telling them to me, probably knowing that I will not like hearing them and that I may become angry or defensive.

I don't have to agree with his feelings in order to receive them, I just have to remain open. It feels scary although I don't know exactly why. Perhaps scary because I do not wrap myself in my usual rejection drama but rather simply listen and accept the feelings as he shares them. Scary because I have no wall up to protect me at that moment. Vulnerable.

Successful intimate communication requires two-way acts of bravery. For one, to openly share, and for the other, to really receive. And for both, to hang in and stay connected while this strange process goes on.

I believe that I told myself I was willing, but I really wasn't ready. I wasn't ready to drop my protection of needing to be right, needing to be understood, needing to be sure things turn out the way I want them to.

The irony of the whole thing is that when I finally "get" this, and thus can accept the feelings my partner shares, he no longer sees me as "that" person he was describing. It feels so strange. I immediately feel like I no longer need to control the outcome and can accept that the relationship will do whatever it needs to do: grow, end, change, whatever.

I feel peace about it all.